Nearly 20 years ago, Mary and I were driving down the coast of California.  We stopped at a Mexican Restaurant for a repast.  Mary order Baileys with her coffee.  After a short discussion with the waiter, he came back to the table and produced a cup of black coffee, with a plate full of bay leaves on the side.

Clearly the order had been misconstrued.

Stick with me for a seocond.

Back in the day…. the way-back day…. there were a lot of shows on Saturday morning.  I loved that time of life.  I can remember watching those morning cartoons at a pretty young age… and I probably kept it up through grade school.

Any way… there is one in particular that I loved.  It was called The Secrets of Isis.  Honest to goodness.  It was about this archaeologist.  She finds this amulet-deal, that lets her turn into the super heroine goddess Isis.  And then she gets all Isis-like and fights evil. (It starred some bit-part actress).

Gosh I loved that show. It was one of the first Girl-Power Shows ever.  I would go out and play like I was that super hero.  I’d repeat her classic line… “Oh Mighty Isis!” to conjure up my very own super powers.

So.  THAT Goddess Isis was from the ancient Egyptian era.  She was worshipped as the ideal mother AND the patroness of nature and magic.

It gets better.  She was the friend of slaves, sinners, artisans and the downtrodden.  But she didn’t draw lines there.  Nope.   She also listened to the prayers of the wealthy, maidens, aristocrats and rulers.  She knew no favorites.

Now.  Imagine my dismay… when one of the most horrible terrorist groups on the face of the planet comes to be known as ISIS.  Some dingle-berry … somewhere… gave…… the The Islamic State, also known as the Islamic State of Iraq and al-Sham…. the Acronym….ISIS.  Big dumb bunnies.

Why couldn’t they have nicknamed them MMF.. for “Monstrous Mudder Fockers.”   Or something like that….

No.  They had to take a perfectly good Goddess and give her a bad name.  A bad connotation. Now… ISIS is totally misconstrued.

Those dang words with two meanings… like LIE.  Either you aren’t telling the truth…   or you are resting in a horizontal position.

But back to Isis.

Certainly, we all have different perspectives on things.  But it really bugs me when things get a bad reputation, due to “guilt by association” or misconceptions, or misinterpretations.

And I guess that is the main thing to remember here.  What could have a powerful and wonderful connotation to one person…. may have an entirely different meaning to someone else.  For whatever reason.

That is where we sometimes have to tread lightly.  Gaining knowledge of the perspectives of others.  We all line up differently… that is for sure.

Be it bay leaves, goddesses, or getting settled in for an afternoon nap.

So the next time you are out…. and  order a Killer Brownie for dessert…. you better find out just who is taking the order.

Let’s talk about “they” for a minute.  Again, I will reiterate, I do NOT know who “they” are.  But “they” are everywhere.

Honest to goodness.  How many times a day, do you here someone say…”Well, I read an article on garbage disposals the other day, and ‘they’ said never to put live snakes in there, without turning on the water first.”

(Okay… don’t get too distracted by the example… it is just terrible to think about really.)

Back at it.  Those pesky “they’s”….

“They” come up with a brand new exciting study of evidence everyday.  Coffee is now good for you.  Whoops… now “they” say it is bad.  Hey look.  Java is now good for you again.  And line up the list:  Red Wine, Red Meat, Fat, Salt, Eggs, Chocolate, Butter, and on and on.  Eat your White Pasty Foods.  Trust me on this one.

Here is the thing…. I’ve come to find out… “they” can be quite flippant.  And indecisive, wishy-washy, and namby-pamby.  You really can’t count on a thing the “they” tell you.

Some real & true recents studies which “they” conducted include:
• New Scientific Study Shows Rich People Cheat and Lie A Lot
• Four or more cups of coffee per day fights off cancer.
• Castration is the key for long life in men.
• Power walking reduces the risk of having a heart attack in half.
• Eating egg yolks is as bad as smoking.
• Female porn stars are happier than other women.
• Do YOU believe in the three second rule? Scientists reveal whether food dropped on the floor is safe to eat (if it’s picked up quickly enough).
• Eggs don’t affect cholesterol levels and Eggs are a great food for weight loss.

Okay.  We won’t hold any of this against “they”… as it may end up being bad for us… in some study somewhere.

So what do we really make of all of this?  What to believe or what to discard?  I mean… in the past two centuries, we have made enormous advancements in science and medicine.

I know this much to be true for me.
We can learn a lot from other people.
The middle ground in any area… is huge.
Having faith in others can be a good thing.
Having faith in others can be a bad thing.
Always, always…. always… prove your source of information.
Experience is your best teacher.

As for the “Theys”….  I think we should be compassionate to others.
So if you ever find a “they”… give ‘em a big hug.  They probably need it.

Believe you can and you’re halfway there.  — Theodore Roosevelt

I have never been a big fan of The Bucket List idea.   If you have one… that is all good, and all.  They are just not for me.  I haven’t quite been able to put my finger on it.   I DO know that one thing that bothers me is when people do things just because they are trendy, and everyone is following along.  Like Lemmings, I’ll tell you.  Right off the cliff sometimes.

The free-thinkers, the ones who march to the beat of their own drum… are the ones I seem to be drawn to.  I don’t really hang out with the Beliebers so very much.

Anyway… back to the bucket list.  I just read an article on it, which captured how I feel about them.

The long and short of it is this…..    I already mentioned that is just seems trendy to me.  The other thing is…..   once people make their list…. they put this really big burden on themselves to get the list accomplished.  And if they aren’t actively pursuing their list… or getting things “Checked-Off”… they begin to feel guilty about it.

But let’s say we do a great job of tracking the items on this down.  Are they totally meaningful activities to us?  I think most of the time, we just put things on that old B-List… because they sounded cool to do.

When I hear people talk about their lists…. most of the things on those bucket lists are just ideas that popped randomly into our heads.  A lot of times… they don’t appear to have anything connected to meaning.

We hear things like “skydiving” and “learning to ski” or “visit the Sahara Desert”…. or eat a hotdog in Yankee Stadium.    I mean… all of these things are interesting activities.

But do we ever write down…. “change someone’s life” or “find a way to help others” or “be compassionate toward those people I love”.  How about “be compassionate with humanity?”

It just doesn’t seem to me that life should be a big to-do list.  I have enough of those between the grocery, and cleaning the house.

If we take the time to notice….. it is my submission that…. the most amazing things are right in front of us.   We can see them right where we are standing, I bet you.   Every day. Right now.

Do we really need to go anywhere….. or see some incredible landmarks …. or drop out of planes…. to experience the wonder of life?

Hmmmm.  Meaningful things each day.

And maybe… if we can’t think of anything meaningful to do in our everyday lives…. that might be a good place for us to start?

I am beginning to think our big purpose here in life, is simply to help one another. That might be our whole shebang. It seems like all the big-thinking-peace makers thought that way.

Mother Teresa once noted… “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”

We belong to each other.

And it was Albert Schweitzer who said… “The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others.”

If that weren’t enough… the Dalai Lama so aptly remarked…“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.”

These are just a few. Yep.  Seems to me we probably could be….  should be….  helping one another.

We know…..  once we have done something with good in our hearts for someone else, selflessly, it feels good to our inner being. It just does. When something feels that good, it must be right.

But helping others can be tricky business. It doesn’t seem like it ought to be… but it is. There are times when we just don’t feel like it. Not one little iota. And there are other times when we have reached out to someone, time and again, and gotten our little noses smacked.

I am not sure how or when we differentiate, other than, learning and growing from past experiences.

I think I DO know…. that it is important to keep trying. Even Ronny Reagan was on board with this one. He wisely gave this advice: “We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone.”

Maybe that is the deal. We don’t need to save the ENTIRE world… just one little bit of it…. at a time.

There is no higher religion than human service. To work for the common good is the greatest creed.  – Woodrow Wilson

I feel I would be remiss if I didn’t talk about St. Patrick’s Day.  I mean, it was March 17th all day today.  People everywhere, dressed in green, wearing funny shamrock hats, and “Kiss Me, I’m Irish” pins, drinking green beer, and such.  Entire cities pouring green dye into their rivers, in the celebration.  It really is a pretty big festivity.   It seems to be teaming with magic, wonder and excitement.

Now…… .. what all of that pomp and circumstance has to do with St. Patrick, I am not sure.  Known as the “Apostle of Ireland,” he is the primary patron saint of Ireland.

And so it happened…when he was about 16…  about the time he should have been learning to drive a car… and not snakes….. , he was captured by Irish pirates from his home in Britain.  From there he was taken as a slave to Ireland.  Not for long though.   He was in Ireland six years before escaping and returning to his family.

Irish Pirates.  Now there is one for you.  Were they little Leprechaun looking fellows in a boat… wearing knickers?  Would they sail around endlessly, looking for the end of the rainbow and their little pots of gold?  I can only wonder, but I am off topic.

It just hit me that no other Ethnic Group in America has such a day…  here in the U.S…. like the Irish do.  Not the Polish, the French, or the Italians.  Not Germans or Russians…. nadda.   Sure there are festivals, like Oktoberfest.   But nothing like this.

I do not have a drop of Irish in me.  Not as far back as I have researched, on both my Dad and my Mom’s lines.  We are German, German, German.. …. and uhhhhnnnn….. German.  I bet most people reading this don’t even know who the Patron Saint of Germany is.

For those who don’t…. it is St. Boniface.  He was a pretty big dude when it came to the establishment of the first organized Christianity in many parts of Germany and Europe.     But like all good Saints… he pretty much died a horrible death.  He was on a missionary trip, and got ransacked by a bunch of traveling burglars.   They killed him dead.  And 52 others who were with him.

I think it might have been the Irish Pirates…. but I can’t say for sure.  The “burglars” were looking for treasure.  Again… I speculate it was those little fellas after those pots of Gold.

But the whole St. Boniface Day thing never caught on in the U.S.  It could be good, I am telling you.  Not that I drink, but I am pretty sure the Germans have better beer…. and a LOT better food than the Irish.  And we wouldn’t be dying everything green.

So… I am starting a movement.  Let us lay down our Shamrocks, and pick up our Oak Trees, one-eyed cats, and BMWs, Volkswagens,  Porsches and Audis.

Weinerschnitzel for everyone.  Lasst die Spiele beginnen.  Das ist gut.

Yet.  The bottom line is this.  It doesn’t really matter how you decided to celebrate March 17th.    What matters.. ….. is that you made a decision to celebrate something.

A lot of time, life just seems like the old “Day In. Day Out” to us.  But, we should be able to find something, anything….. to celebrate… each and every day.    Today I found cause in a lot of things… from someone to making me smile with a comment about how my name-spelling went…. to being blessed  enough to have fresh chicken eggs in the morning.

No matter what the cause… we should take the time to celebrate the magic and the wonder in life’s little gifts.   Our little pots of gold.  Minus the mean green Irish Pirates.

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. ~Thornton Wilder

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. ~Epictetus

Names.

They sure can complicate things.  I think most people don’t like their names when they are young.  Kids can find anything to make fun of in a name.  But most of the time, as we get older, somehow we grow in to our names… and accept them.  Heck….. even LIKE them.

They say if you live in a glass house you shouldn’t throw stones.  Well, I can tell you… with a name like Polly Cecile Constance Kronenberger…. I better never cast a stone.  But I mostly like my name now.  Except when I have to sign a whole bunch of legal documents, or checks.  THEN, it becomes a little cumbersome.

But when it comes down to it, some names are just better than others.  Some, are downright awesome.  A few of my favorites include….

Wink Martindale
Weeb Ewbank
Greta Garbo
Fuzzy Zoeller
Babe Deidrickson
Boris Karloff
Bo Diddley
Tiki Barber
Red Skelton

Names pop into my head all the time… out of the clear blue.  I mean, I’ll be eating dinner, and right in the middle of a forkful of coleslaw… I will think… Maria Shriver.  Or Jay Leno. Or Christopher Lloyd.  Or whatever.  And I just shake my head and say “What the holy crap.  Now what the heck does that mean….?”   And then there are … some names I don’t care for at all.  It is probably more the person, than the name.

But our names can be a mixed bag.  I am glad to have a unique name, I think.  I don’t know that I would especially care for being a Mary Smith, or something.  Not than anything is wrong with either of those names, but I imagine it might complicate life on some levels.  Like there are probably 50 people named Mike Jones who have an account with Time Warner.  Maybe more.   The biggest hurdle I have when I call in about my accounts is spelling Kronenberger 4 or 5 times.

Hey….. Do you think Cavemen had names for one another?

Names… I’ll tell you.  Some names give certain people the one-up.  Like a guy who goes in to interview for the head of some IT Department somewhere.  If his name is Stephen Gates, he is probably going to have a better chance than Freddy Fadoozle.  But the long and short of it is this.  Our names shouldn’t matter in how we are treated…. no matter what might be attached to the “name”….

The old …. … you can’t judge a book by its cover… should go for names to.  There shouldn’t be any prejudgements, just because your name is associated with a certain family, or group, or region.

We should be seen for who we are.  Not the name on our label.

Now, “Name Calling” is an entirely different matter, which we will go into some other night.  But just for the record, I wish you all would quit calling me Big Dweeb.  I’m starting to act like one….

You just never know who is going to show up at the party, now do you?  Oh sure….. you think you do.  But DO YOU?

Take this for example.  We decided to put out a Deer Trough at the beginning of this nearly-past Winter.  We filled it with whole corn, every day.  And the deer came.   They ate.  They were happy.  Heck, WE were happy.

We would smile and wave at them, and they would raise a hoof back.  Like a long-distance “Hoof Bump.”  Ssss’all Good Baby.

But wait.  What is happening here?  The next thing you know, every Tom, Dick, and Harry decides they can come to the Banquet too.  Of course we had birds of all designs.  But raccoons, possum, chipmunks, squirrels… you name it… we had it.

When it is colder than a well-digger’s booty… well… I guess everybody needs a good frozen corn meal.

Yes.  We had some guests we didn’t really intend on having.  In fact… the party was out of control.

But this is just yet another example of the bigger picture, if you ask me.

In life, in general, we simply can’t control everything.  A lot of times… we can’t control most things.

Our intentions may be good and we may have constructed a well-mapped out plan.  But much to our dismay, at times, things just don’t “pan out” the way we thought they would.

Your daughter marries that guy that’s been divorced twice, and has five kids from another marriage.  Your cat pees on your dinner guest’s shoes…. right during the main course.   You get sick the night before  you go on vacation.   The chocolate soufle’ just collapsed in the over.

We may have planned…. even prepared…. for these things to go much differently,  Yet.  When it comes right down to it… life’s events unfold and evolve however they dang well please.

One little tickity tock at a time.
So what do we do?

Well, in the case of our trough, we could have simply quit putting corn out there.  That would have stopped the raccoons, and the possum, and the squirrels alright.  But it would have stopped the deer too.  And that was our original purpose and intention.  Our good measure would have been curtailed.

No… I don’t think we should ever lose sight of what is in our good hearts to begin with. We just have to accept that the goodness  in our hearts still is very much there…. it is just taking form in some other way.    Maybe what is getting in the way… is what is in our heads.

All of this may sound a bit corny…  but… if you ever want to talk more about any of this…. I will certainly lend you an ear.

The smallest deed is better than the greatest intention.  —  John Burroughs

I have some super-duper friends, I’ll tell you.  They are as good as gold… as sweet as pie.

One of my good friends mentioned today…. that she hopes I write about pie tonight.  I think this is my first request for a topic.  So pie she will have.  By the slice or even the whole of it.

Of course I have to mention that I used to love pie when I was a kid.   Like it was some kind of drug.   I had two favorites.  Butterscotch…. and Pecan.  Oh my goodness, my Grandma Jeanette K passed on some crazy-good recipes when it came to those gems.  And it really helped that my Mom and my brother could bake like crazy.  Especially my big brother Ed.  Mmm, how I loved that pie.   But I wouldn’t eat just one slice.  I always at 3.14 slices.   Just for good measure.

But when did all this madness begin?  Well I’ll tell you.  Where almost everything else seemed to originate.  Back with those ancient Egyptians.   Early pies were in the form of flat, round crusty cakes.    They were called galettes.  The crusts were made up of ground oats, and wheats, and such.  But the yummy treat inside was honey.   Yes, my honey pie.

And get this..  …. . to revisit the age-old  question of which came first, the chicken or the egg..  Well perhaps it was the pie.  Sometime before 2000 BC, a recipe for chicken pie was written on a tablet in Sumer (that’s in Egypt).   Ooooh.  I got to get  ME some Chicken Pie.

But hold the phone here.  Maybe my friend wanted to know about pi…. and not pie.  You know today is March 14…. in the year 2015.   And looky there at the first digits of the mathematical pi.    It is 3.1415.  THAT Pi.

If you really wanted to celebrate with the big math-dogs….  take it out a few more places….. and you should have clicked your heels at 9:26:53 a.m. (3.141592653).   I know I did!  Those nine digits are more than enough for most applications requiring pi.

The first calculation of pi was done by Archimedes of Syracuse (287–212 BC), one of the greatest mathematicians of the ancient world. Archimedes approximated the area of a circle by using the Pythagorean Theorem.  I like to call him Arch-ey and the Pythags.   Like a Rock Group… only smarter.

So what is Pi?  Well… basically…. Pi is an infinite, non repeating decimal.  Pi (π) is the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter.   And…. as I mentioned….. that good old tasty Pi is a constant number.  That means that for all circles of any size, Pi will be the same.  3.14.

In other words…. If you cut a Pecan Pie …. from edge to edge… right across the center…..  it will take your knife 3.14 times that exact distance…. to go ALL the way around the outside of the pie.  But don’t cut that crust off yet.  That would be a crummy thing to do.

And if your pie comes up missing… do you know what would Archey and Jeanette say about such a thing……   perhaps…..

Let pie-gones be pie-gones.  OR maybe….

If at first you don’t succeed, pi, pi again.

I’ll take the Pi Road, you take the low road.

Live and Let Pie.

Pie for a Pie, Tooth for a Tooth.

Oh… thanks for putting up with all of this.   But if you are tired of reading my meanderings, perhaps you might enjoy something else… like….
J.D. Salivator’s A Catcher in the Pie

Luck.

Does it exist?  Is luck real?

Or is everything going according to some great predetermined master plan.  Has it all been mapped out with some predestination of the universe, or written in a Golden Book somewhere, scribed in Golden Letters?

People seem to believe in luck, or lack there of.  So many take heed on Friday the 13th, sidestep a ladder on the sidewalk, or the black cat walking.

The good luck side of it is just as strong.  Take Las Vegas for example.  Now the people who OWN Las Vegas bank on the odds.  But the people GOING to Las Vegas are putting their belief in Good-Luckiness.  Same with the Lottery.  The folk’s popping the balls from the hopper are well-aware of the probability ratio. The one’s holding tickets have their faith in good luck.

But is it real?

I can’t say for sure.  I tend to believe it is true.  I mean, some people “seem” luckier than others.  Yet, could it be that mapped out plan just taking its course?  It complicates things either way.

Stephen Hawking once noted, “I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road.”

See what I mean…?  But it gets even stickier… I’ll tell you.

Chris Pine said…. “I believe in luck and fate and I believe in karma, that the energy you put out in the world comes back to meet you.”

Either way.   The answer is this.  In our very limited human brains, we will probably never know one way or the other.  Has our life been determined since the Big-Bang-Kaboomed?    What if we find a penny face up on the sidewalk… or step on a crack while we are strolling down that same sidewalk…. is it going to figure into the way the rest of the day plays out?

I couldn’t say for sure.

I do know this.  Most of the time… when someone asks you to “Wish Them Luck”… they are preparing to take an unnecessary risk.  Like going over the Niagara Falls in a barrel.  Or jumping from a plane with a parachute on.

Here is the thing though….There is a lot to be said for good old common sense.  A good solid decision based on former experience or knowledge.    Maybe we have been asking for the wrong thing… all along?  Perhaps instead of saying… “Wish me luck.” …. we should say… “Wish me Good Sense.”

We’ve all lost something.  Often times, it is something as simple as your car keys.  You may want to check the refrigerator, right next to the  Cheese Whiz Jar.  OR….. following that same line of thought…  maybe you’ve lost your entire car.  Chances are you are just a little turned around in the parking garage.  Third floor, not second.

I am not too crazy about losing things.  I sort of live by that old phrase… “A place for everything, and everything in its place.”  That’s how I grew up.  And it stuck.

But the truth of it is…. most of the time… things aren’t truly lost.  They are merely misplaced.

So, when you are freaking out, up and down, because you can’t find the remote control for the TV… and Dancing with the Stars starts in five minutes….  it might be best to just take a deep breath, relax, and try to remember what was going on the last time you were watching TV…. you know…… all those reruns of Hee Haw.

Alright… segue here.  I am not going to fault you for watching Hee Haw, or for eating Cheese Whiz right out of the jar.  I have my guilty pleasures too.  Okay, back to it.

Losing things.  And finding them.  They are simply misplaced.

But sometimes, we experience a loss which is much more significant than the cap for the toothpaste tube.

We lose a person.

Yes.  We lose someone very near, and very dear to us.  What then?

Losing someone or something you love is undoubtedly….. very painful.  We might experience all kinds of difficult emotions.   There are times when it may feel like the pain and sadness will never ease off.

This happens to all of us.  We might be depressed, angry, afraid, or even in a state of denial, or guilt.  These are normal reactions to a significant loss. And of course, we are all different.  There are no right or wrong ways to grieve.  But…. There are a ton of “coping” mechanisms out there for us to explore.  I won’t go in to all of that here.  That is better left for the one’s with training and degrees on the walls.

But I will ask this.  Like our keys, or the remote control…  are the people we lose… really lost?  OR are they just misplaced from our ability as humans to perceive them?

I know, they are gone from our lives, as we know it.  They have physically passed.  We can’t hold them, or kiss them, or scruff up the hair on the tops of their heads.  In that way they are gone.

But possibly, they are with us, in different ways.  Their energy, their spirit, their legacy, and all the gifts they gave to us during life.  Maybe not physical gifts, but emotional and spiritual gifts.  In all sorts of directions.  Love. Kindness. Compassion.  Companionship.  Faith in Goodness.  Hope.

Maybe to find them, we just have to take a deep breath, relax, and start remembering, and looking in the places where it never occurred to us to look.

No, you probably won’t find  your sister Mimi in the fridge, next to the Cheese Whiz Jar… unless of course… she is still alive… like my sister Mimi…. and she has this total “thing” for Cheese Whiz by the tablespoon.  In that case… keep an eye on the Ritz Crackers too.  And the bacon.

But.  Loss can deal us a tremendous blow.  It can knock us off our feet, our game, and even off of our lives.   My guess is… if we feel so much pain and sadness about our loss, that person must have been pretty incredible.

And I bet that incredible person would want us to live in the light, and not the dark.  That person probably taught us a lot about the true essence of life…. and we could honor them… by living it well.  That is what I am guessing.

Live it well.