Human emotions can really be something.  We have a whole caboodle of them, I’ll tell you.  Everything from happiness, surprise, anger, courage, pity, patience, and more.  And of course.. .there is always fear.

People are afraid of different things.  Some people seek out the emotion of fear.  We go on rides at amusement parks to scare us… or to haunted houses at Halloween…  perhps, even,  diving off bridges with bungee cords on our ankles.  Heck… watching scary movies.

I’ve had the opportunity to spend a bit of time with most of my siblings this past week. Some out-of-towners are IN.  This evening, we were talking about watching scary movies as kids… on Shock Theater.  It used to scare the hair right off our chinny-chin-chins.

And sometimes, the things which used to scare us… don’t scare us any more.  In my case, spiders, snakes, flying, heights, and a few others… are all fears of the past.  Same goes for those old movies on Shock Theater. Most are down right cheesy now.  Those frights are gone.

But there are certain circumstances which cause more fear than we like to know.  It typically happens, when something is wrong with someone we love or truly care about.  I had one of those things today.

This morning, as I was plotting out my most important day, and all the “important” things that had to be done… I was told that our oldest, and smallest dog, Maxine… had just ingested a large pink pellet of rat poison.

That sort of thing will certainly upend you.  I was  filled with fear.  In an instant.

As it turns out, she seems to be okay, for now.  We sought out medical help, and they did as much as they can do for such a thing.  When I was at the Vet’s Office with her… well… waiting while they worked…..  I started to breathe and tried to release my “want”  for control and predictability.  I had to let go of the fact that I am never, REALLY… the one who is calling the shots.  Control is impossible to get.  I mean….. even if you are a world class swimmer, it is still possible to drown.

And today, was a little rough, but I am now filled with other emotions, as things calmed down.

The biggest of those are gratitude and hope.

I can only think that my awareness of gratitude and hope have been elevated…. because of this early brush with fear.

I also think that most of the time, things happen for a reason.  And that reason is learning how to live life.  In this case, I was reminded that my “important” list of things today… became quite unimportant… without a moment’s notice.

It also reminded me that the Universe is working however it is working… without any consultation from me.

I am not sure it makes those “uncomfortable” times any easier, but at least I can try to learn from life’s lessons.

Today…. we are younger than we are ever going to be again.

Play.
Play.
Play.

Because on this day… this very moment…. we are younger than we are ever going to be.

Have joy in your heart.
Lightness in your soul.
Music in your being.

And Chocolate Eggs in your pocket.

 Youth has no age.  —  Pablo Picasso

I once knew this kid who would put her fingers in her mouth…the pinky and the pointer… and then she would whistle like crazy.  Loudly.  Cooly.  I was nine.  I wanted to whistle like this when I was nine years old … but as hard as I tried… nothing would come out by blustery air.

Now, I am several decades older.  And I still can’t whistle like this.

A lot of the things I have tried in life.. I can “get” pretty quickly.  This whistling thing is not.  Neither is snow skiing, sewing, or Advanced Calculus.  Making precise use of the differential notations in math leaves me….. well…. a bit indifferent.  Empty.  Feeling negative.  (Okay, all joking aside… back to it.)

On the other hand, there are things I can do with ease.  Bird Watching. Sweeping the kitchen floor.  Making Poached Eggs.  All very useful skills at times.  They are just not whistling, sewing, or Calculus.

Yes we all have different talents.  But we all have different aspirations too.

And sometimes, our own individual talents don’t quite match up with our talents.  For instance… have you ever seen the show… American Idol.  There are some people with some serious ambitions there… but a tiny bit short on the talent.

I think when the two things line up in a person, you have those that excel past the rest.  The Presidents.  The Rock Stars.  Those Rocket Scientists.  And Super Athletes.    You get the likes of Oprah Winfrey, Julia Child, Lebron James, and Lady Gaga.

But just because one isn’t famous… doesn’t mean they are on the high scale of things.  I think luck has a lot to do with fame.

Yep… every day… I meet (and KNOW) people who are wildly talented at what they do.  I stand in awe sometimes.  The innovators, and idea makers.  The problem solvers and the peace keepers.  Good plumbers, and excellent cooks.  Gardeners, and bee keepers.

We all bring something different to the table.  We all contribute to this life in numerous ways.   We are unique and distinct.  It is good this way.  In such…. we need each other.  And needing one another is a part of being human.  For that is what humans do.  Not only do we need one another… but we can be there for others.  And that is a beautiful thing.

Especially if you need someone to poach your eggs.

There are certain people who seem to really have figured out this living life thing.  They appear to be completely at ease in their own skin, and are happy to be where ever it is they happen to be.  Undoubtedly, those few have learned to dance in the rain.  I can only think they must have been friends with the likes of Friedrich Nietzsche.

They must have been hanging out together, in the break room at work, eating tuna salad sandwiches and Fritos, when Friedrich would say things like this…..  Just like this.

“What if a demon were to creep after you one night, in your loneliest loneliness, and say, ‘This life which you live must be lived by you once again and innumerable times more; and every pain and joy and thought and sigh must come again to you, all in the same sequence. The eternal hourglass will again and again be turned and you with it, dust of the dust!’ Would you throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse that demon? Or would you answer, ‘Never have I heard anything more divine’?”

And then… maybe later that night, they hooked up with F. Scott Fitzgerald, and went out for Bowling and Hot Wings.  And after rolling a strike or two.. F. Scott would sit back down on the ball return and say…

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”

That’s how it must have happened.  At least, that is what I am saying tonight.

It has been said that a picture is worth a thousand words.  In some cases, that statement is true.

At other times, not so much.

But when I go out with my camera, and just have a look around… No matter where I am standing… or for that matter…. the place or the time…. I can see a thousand different pictures.  And each of them have a thousand different words…. which add up to a thousand different stories.

The other day, I walked down a random alley in town.  I saw so many things that made me wonder, or gave me things to consider.  I will imagines those stories, about those sights, or circumstances.

An old towel left draped over a fence.
Three dogs, in junkyard dog world.
A brick wall, still standing, but barely.

It all seems to me…. that much has transpired here… in all the time before I arrived.  Arrived on this scene with my camera in hand, to capture these things in this precise moment.

And after I leave, they will change again.

It is simply, the passage of time.  Never before.  Never again.

It is my guess that we shouldn’t wish that time away…. or even wish for it back.  But while it is here, we should drink it in, for all it is worth.  We might be doing our best when we are in each moment, being aware.  And simply.  Being.

Creating a thousand pictures.  With a thousand words.  Each and every precise moment of our lives.

 
Time passes irrevocably.  –  Virgil

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.  — Steven Wright

Tonight I will tell the story of the famous Mexican Bandit named El Owel.  True Story.   Of course, from Mexican Bandit, you may have surmised this story took place in Mexico.  It was back in the days when cowboys were cowboys, and the west was a wild as …. well…. The Wild West.

But Mexico was WAY, WAY wilder.  And way more dangerous.  Much like it is today…. even when you compare it to the south side of LA.

But nonetheless, El Owel was one of the most renowned bandits of the time.  His real name was Pancho El Owelez.  He used to rob trains, stage coaches, banks, and even rich people… right in their own homes.

About the only places he didn’t steal money from was whore houses and saloons.  For obvious reasons.  Nobody, not even a Mexican Bandit… wishes to burn bridges.

At any rate, he was pretty fierce, against the entities he stole money from.  And he stole a lot.  He made Jesse James look like Shirley Temple.   But he had a good side too.  He always gave a bunch of the money to the poor people.  He would ride through the towns… and EVERYONE knew he was coming.  El Owel would throw Gold Pesos and Gold Escudos in the streets.  (Even the “sheriffs” would look the other way… as they were grabbing up gold coins.)

But here is the deal.  He used to laugh out loud when he was robbing people.  He laughed his fool head off. And he had a funny high pitched laugh.. reportedly.

Everyone loved him.  Everyone would shout his name in the streets.  (Well… the poor “Everyone”)  But they would shout…. El Owel!  El Owel!  Graffiti followed of course.  And when people penned letters, and wanted to express laughter or delight… they would write his name.

Of course, over the years, this was handed down, time and again.   These days we can find it in our modern culture… mostly on the internet.  LOL.

And that is the way and the legend…. of the dirty, low-down, dusty, stealing, conniving, good-natured, kind-hearted, generous, Mexican Bandit.
LOL.  LOL.  El Owel!    Estoy lleno de mierda.

Well… I guess you could call this a bonus post… or perhaps a Bon Voyage.

I know I’ve said it before, but this time… good dear friends…. I  am writing in all sincerity. 

You know, I check the ‘stats’ on this Project 10374, or The Big Can Do, or whatever.  Most days, I get pretty good viewership.  But lately, things have dropped off.  Not so much overall, but BIG flex is days. It makes me wonder.

It is getting more difficult for me to feel “fresh” with this.  Most days, I feel like I am boring you to tears. That makes me wonder too.

At any rate, the long and short of it is this.  I said yesterday, if my numbers didn’t hit a certain mark today…. I was hanging up the Ol’ Writing App.

And guess what happened.   Little bitty numbers.  Which sort of tells me that the Universe might be telling me something.  Like the big black hole… the one closest to us in the Universe … sent those vacuous stats to me.  It could happen.

So.  It is a filled with a sort of sadness when I say that I am going to close this chapter… with a huge, and incredible, and wonderful…. THANKS ….  to all who have stuck through it with me.  And a big “Loving Heart Wish” to all.

As Mr. Murrow said.  Good Night. And Good Luck.

I was reminded of this, once again today.

We are tiny specks.

Oh it is true.   We are just little teensy weensy pieces of the pie.  Heck.  Less than that.   Not even a piece of the pit in the cherry in the pie.

You see…..  the average number of friends for a person to have on Facebook is 338.  The median number is 200.  Which means half of all Facebook users have more than 200 friends, and half have less than 200.

Now.  Let’s say you know all 338 people like crazy.  You know them inside and out, upside and down. (Of course we know it isn’t true. I am a great example.  There are some of my “Facebook Friends” that I haven’t actually seen in a few decades.  How well can you know them?)

But back to it.   Let us suppose you DO know all 338.  Bosom Buddy-ish.

Okay.  There are more than 7 billion people on the planet.  Which means you DON’T know around 6,999,999,662 people.  That’s a lot of people you don’t know.  Me too…. come to think of it.

Take it one further.  Our Solar System is just ONE member of a vast Milky Way galaxy…. which has billions of stars.  More than Hollywood.   And then consider this….. how many galaxies are in the whole big unending Universe?  The most current estimates guess that there are 100 to 200 billion galaxies in the Universe, each of which has hundreds of billions of stars.  Are you feeling woozy yet?  I AM feeling woozy… I’ll tell you that right now.  And I have a LOT of Facebook Friends.

So there we are.

Specks. Of dust. In the bigger scheme of things.

But not so fast.  WHAT…. really, what is the bigger scheme? Of “things”…

Well.  I think WHAT we do with our life energy means a LOT.  That is the big picture right there.  Because when you start adding 1 + 1 + 1, and on, you finally get to 7 billion.  And if each of those “1”s is doing good, in their own little “Speckdom”…. then you have a whole lotta GOOD going on in the world.

As Dr Seuss so aptly put it…..“To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world.”

“Hey Speck!   Yeah.  You there.   Be that one person.  And be it well.”

I am big fan of sports.  I have been… since as long as I can remember.  It is probably caused by some genetic combination of brains cells.  But it doesn’t run in the family.

At any rate….

I am.  What I am.  And what I am… needs no excuses.  (Okay… singing tangent there for a moment… thank you Gloria Gaynor.

Okay, back at it.  Sports fan.  And… I am a big fan of the college basketball scene.  When it gets to tournament time, I truly love to watch.  Men’s and Women’s.  IF you are NOT a sport’s fan… stick with me.  I’m not going there tonight.

This year,  I can’t really see anyone beating the Kentucky Men’s Team… or the University of Connecticut on the Women’s side of things.

The Men’s final four is Kentucky, Wisconsin, Duke and Michigan State.  (I meant it stick with me.)

The Women’s final four is not yet determined.

But let’s break down the Men’s.
KY State Bird = Northern Cardinal
WI State Bird = American Robin
NC State Bird = Northern Cardinal
MI State Bird = American Robin

What do you think about THAT coincidence?  Now THAT is something you won’t get from ESPN statistics, I’ll tell you.

And where do those birds sit?  Trees…
KY State Tree = Tulip Tree
WI State Tree = Sugar Maple
NC State Tree = Longleaf Pine
MI State Tree = Eastern White Pine

And under the tree?  Wildlife Mammals…
KY State Mammal = Gray Squirrel
WI State Mammal = White Tailed Deer
NC State Mammal = Gray Squirrel
MI State Mammal = White Tailed Deer

So based on that criteria alone.. you can see that Kentucky is unbeatable this year… although Duke comes close.

However… everyone knows that the Tulip Tree beats the Longleaf Pine every time.

So there you have it.  My secret to picking the brackets… of which I picked 3 of the 4 final teams.  The exception was Michigan State.  I didn’t see that one coming… with the combination of White Pine and White Tailed Deer.  Normally those two would have cancelled each other out.

I draw all of this out on a huge chalkboard… which includes many other factors, such as state drink, rock and plant, to name a few.  It can be pretty intense when I am formulating and organizing this information.  Crazy go nuts.

The NFL Draft picks are way worse.

But you know. That’s how I roll.

Again.. Ms. Gaynor …. if you will break into song here…

I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses
I deal my own deck
Sometimes the aces sometimes the deuces
It’s one life and there’s no return and no deposit
One life so it’s time to open up your closet
Life’s not worth a dam till you can shout out
I am what I am
I am what I am

“It takes nothing to join the crowd.  It takes everything to stand alone.”  — Hans F. Hansen

“And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.” – Nietzsche

I have an awful lot of theories.  About most things in life.  I am not sure there is any right or wrong to many of them.  Who can be so sure, really?  But I make postulations on a regular basis.  I AM sure of that.

One of such is this:  It is my thought that we can pray however we want to pray. That is, IF we choose to pray.  We also have the option and freedom, not to pray.  If we do pray …. I believe your way is the very best way for you, and my way is the very best way for me.

So.  As I am watching the NCAA Tournament this evening, specifically Duke vs. Gonzaga, I see a “mother” of one of the Duke players in the stands.  Her boy is on the free throw line.  Holy smokes, he really needs to make this one!  So there she is in the stands, both hands raised up over her head, palms open to the heavens above, and praying to God that her boy makes the shot… like her life depended on it.

And I said out loud… “Lady, I am pretty sure God has better things to do this afternoon than watch the Duke Blue Devils play the Gonzaga Zags.  Like …. maybe…. worrying about all the death and destruction humans are inflicting on each other in so many places on the planet.”

Hold on Kronenberger!  You hypocrite.  Who are you to say?  It is your belief, Polly old girl, that people can pray however they like.  The same holds true for the Blue Devil Mother in the basketball arena.  So… I took it back… right then and there.

I thought more about it too.  Maybe God is funny.  Maybe God is a huge basketball fan.  He might be sitting there in his Lay-Z-Boy chair… the green leather one…. way up there in heaven… munching on a bag cheese doodles… sipping a cold beer.. and watching the game with his Blue Devils t-shirt on.  Who’s to say?

And that is the beautiful choice we have in life.  Or the one we SHOULD have in life.  Our free will.  Our freedom to choose how we want to think, and pray, and speak.  Our freedom to be whoever we want to be… just like everybody else… and completely different from every one else.  We are humans.  Equals.  Free will….. if we are lucky.

It makes me wonder about our big round planet …. when those things are jerked away from others.  Those laws which people put in place, which say we can discriminate against others, because we think they aren’t praying right.  They aren’t like us… so we don’t have to treat them with the same respect as the people who ARE like us.  Yep.  It sure does make me wonder… and not in a good way.  But I am in the constant predicament of attempting to learn things.

So back to the beginning.  My first assertion.  We all have the right to BE and to PRAY and to LIVE… as our hearts guide us.  Yet….  If some one thinks their way is the absolute way… and others be damned… well they are way smarter than I’ll ever hope to be. It is simply amazing… that they have it all figured out.  They might even run a whole entire state… like Indiana.  Maybe…. they should be up there in heaven, in the green leather recliner, calling all the shots.  That way, I suppose… God  could actually GO to a ballgame every now and again.

Learning never exhausts the mind.  —  Leonardo da Vinci

I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.  —  Pablo Picasso