It was a warm night in April. A light mist filled the night sky.  The old white house was quiet.  Perhaps…… too quiet.  All six children were fast asleep.  They were tucked as “snug as a bug in the rug” as they laid softly in their beds.

And then suddenly, in the dark of night, the cry rang out.  “Paul…. Wake up.  It’s time.”  The house lit up.

Some eight hours later the seventh child was born into this world.  At 9:05 on a Wednesday morning.

The scene in the delivery room was reminiscent to the scene in the Batman Returns, when the baby Penguin, Danny Devito, is born unto the parents,  Mr. & Mrs. Penguin.  They were in disbelief.  A penguin-child was given to them, there in their great big mansion.  But they put the newborn into a basket and released it to the sewers.

But sometimes, life is stranger than fiction.  You see, on this Wednesday morning in April, a Tweety-Walrus Child was born.  Oh, indeed.  Half Tweety-Bird and the other half, Walrus.

Unlike the movie however, this family did not abandon the freak-child.  Instead, they taught her to be as much like a normal human as…… humanly possible.

They taught her to eat with a fork and knife, how to speak the English Language, and eventually how to walk. Though she still waddled, and flapped her arms from time to time.   The child was an avid swimmer… like a walrus.  And she frequently tried to fly by diving off tall structures.   However, time after time, this failed miserably.  The numerous face plants  straight into the ground…. from very tall places…. made a lasting mark on the young child.  In more ways than one.

But I digress.

Back to the family.  They kept her, although at times it was difficult.  They drew straws to see who had to hold her…. when she needed to be held.  And they could barely stand the smell of her, as she had a voracious appetite for sardines sprinkled with sunflower seeds.  When she cried, she sounded much like a Wookie.  A big Wookie.

Yes…. They kept her.  But they tried…. as best they could…. not to let her know that she was different.  But she knew.   Deep down inside she knew.

It wasn’t until 50 years later that the child discovered her true identity.  Two letters came to her on the very same day.  From the Law Offices of Hockup, Pluckit, and Roach.  One from the Beatles, and the other from Warner Brothers.

The first read… “You are the Walrus.  Ka-koo-koo-ka-choo.”  And the second said….”You did… in fact….  see a Puttteee Tat.”

She stared down at the letters.

And wept.

Like a Wookie.

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”
― Aristotle

“When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”
― Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man

“And you? When will you begin that long journey into yourself?”
― Rumi

Big Conundrum.   And you KNOW I have them.

You see, today I learned the Secret to Life, and all Greater Enlightenment of Mind, Body, and Spirit.

So.  Do I write about THAT…. or ….  do I write about Swiss Cheese?

Okay. Swiss Cheese it is.

Now.  You would think Swiss Cheese would be from Switzerland.  But alas.  “Swiss Cheese” is basically the generic name in North America for several related varieties of cheese.  The most of these are made right here in the good ol’ USA.  That and Canada.

Our Swiss Cheese LOOKS like a particular kind of cheese from Switzerland. It is called Emmental.  And Emmental is so VERY tasty.  I can tell you that from personal experience.

So why do we call our Swiss Cheese…. “Swiss Cheese?”  Well here is the little deal.   It is because of the distinctive appearance.  Yes, those  blocks of the cheese are riddled with holes known as “eyes”. Swiss cheese without eyes is known as “blind.”  For the Three Blind Mice, no doubt.

But the Emmental(er) was the one to have the holes in the first place.

And to solve a partial part of my conundrum, I will tell you this.  Swiss Cheese is a lot like life.

You can look at it one of two ways.  You may think it is incomplete, or lacking, because of all the holes or gaps.  Like somehow, you have been slighted, because there is so much missing from the block of cheese.

OR… you can see it this way.  That it is a glorious chunk of cheese… that is incredible robust in flavor and texture.  It is solid, and comes in a beautiful shade of golden silkiness.  Above all of that, it is versatile, and will go with so many different things… in any number of places.  And yes, occasionally you will slice through one of the holes.  You might be missing out on that little bit of cheese.  But once you get past the hole, there is more excellent cheese just on the other side.

So, every time we hit a big gaping hole in our lives… when our hearts are broken, or when we struggle with sadness or despair;  when we face illness or hardship… we can hang on… and make it through that hole.  Until once again… we can find that glorious cheese.

And cut the cheese.
Whoops.  Pardon me.

I don’t believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.
— Joseph Campbell

The meaning of life is not to be discovered only after death in some hidden, mysterious realm; on the contrary, it can be found by eating the succulent fruit of the Tree of Life and by living in the here and now as fully and creatively as we can.
— Paul Kurtz