People hate a lot of things.  At least they say so.  They will get a paper cut, and say… “Oh, I hate paper cuts.”  Or along the same lines… with insects, or reptiles, or fuzzy creatures.  They might say… “I hate snakes.  I hate mice.  I hate flies.  I hate maggots.”

My guess is… they simply have a strong dislike or fear of “that something.”  Because “hate” to me seems pretty destructive and severe.

Hate.  A four-letter word if you ask me.  Of the worst kind.  Of course we have all been thinking about it lately, in some context or another.  Who can help it?  Nine people were killed in the city of Charleston, SC, as a result of it.

I think…. hate masks personal insecurities. Now… this is not true of all insecure people.  I am pretty darn insecure, and I can’t think of anything I truly hate.

But when insecurities ARE involved… the “hate” elevates the hater above the hated.  I really think that is what gets the ball rolling.  The other part is fear.  They fear what they don’t know…. or things which are different than they are.

And…. Haters rarely hate alone. It seems to me… they have a compulsion to get others on the bandwagon. They attempt to entreat others to hate as they do.

That sense of peer validation makes them feel more worthy, and a “part” of something.  Like they belong in the world.  It is a way of escaping the insecurities…. and feeling empowerment.

This is just my two-bit assessment.  But.  I have been thinking about it a lot lately.  I don’t understand how someone could feel so strongly as to do something violent towards someone else.

When I have gotten my angriest in life, I have slammed a door, or a drawer.  Or thrown a softball down hard in the dirt.  And I am ashamed of those times.

I just can’t understand how someone hates someone or something with such seething vehemence.  I am SO VERY THANKFUL I do not know this place of destructive emotion.  I am glad I don’t have it in me.

All I can do in when I hear of such atrocities, is to pray for peace.  To the Universe, the High Power, the God, or any one who will listen.

Our world has much goodness in it.  I believe our best action against hate… is love.  Do the good thing.  Show compassion.  Find patience.  Walk in peace.  Hold peace in our hearts, in our minds, and in our hearts.  Carry it in our back pockets, and cradle it in our arms.  Take care of love, and goodness, and peace.  And they will take care of us.

Today was full of a lot of things.  Like, really great moments.  And a lot of learning too.

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Take for instance the fact that Maxie just wanted on my lap, just as I sat down to write.  So I obliged.  And she composed the line just above this paragraph.  Good dog.  Smart dog.  I am not sure what she wanted to say exactly.  You see… it is hard for her to type with those little paws.

Earlier in the day, I found out that a lot of people in the early 1900s, broke their arms when they would try to start their cars.  I guess those hand-crank starters could really kick back and hurt you.  So that very young Charles Kettering invented the self-starter for the automobile.  He, and a few others.  They did in a barn… the Deed’s Barn.

How do I know?  We took the grand boys  to Carrillon Park this morning… and afternoon.  What a great day, and what an incredible place.  It had been a lot of years since I had been there.  There is so much there to see and do and learn.

We saw tons of old, and very amazing cash registers.
We rode the carousel.
We found a secret door in one of the buildings.
And… we also discovered the last refrigerator produced at Frigidaire.  It was covered with signatures.  My Dad’s X is somewhere on that fridge.  But we couldn’t find it….as two sides could not be seen.

Then… we had a frightening moment. We saw the early Dayton Setters….. George and Mary Newcomb.  They were not the prettiest of people.  Nor was their daughter Jane. But perhaps they were quite smart people.  But they looked a little on the scary side.

We ate at Spaghetti Warehouse, where all little spaghetti and meatball lovers… like to go.  And we picked up plants of all sorts… at Stockslager’s Nursery.

There were some down turns to the day too.  A couple of bumps in the road.  Like… one of my tamest fish.. Mary Josephine,… was dead in the Koi Pond when we got home.   And Frances’ boy… Dashe… has a malignant tumor in his head.  He is my sister’s dog.  I love that boy.

Sometimes it is hard to balance my mood when there are good things going on, and bad things going on…. at the very same time.  It is like getting all those great presents on Christmas Morning… your G.I.Joe with the Kung Fu Grip… and everything.  But at the same time, you know there are children starving in Africa.  Your parents told you so when you didn’t want to finish your Pinto Beans three nights ago.  So you are torn between feeling happy and sad.

This is true for me… a lot of days of my life.  I am torn between the happy and the sad.  Maybe we are supposed to walk the line, like Johnny Cash said.  I just don’t know.

But I do know, that most days, life is very good to me.  And for that, I am eternally grateful.  So very thankful for all the blessings in my life, and there are many.  Starting right off… with the three people who were sharing my day today.

“Believe and act as if it were impossible to fail.”  —      Charles F. Kettering quote

Do you ever want to be somebody else?  Not someone specifically… so to say.  But.  Do you every want YOU…. yourself …. to be doing something…. else?

Okay… here is a for instance.  Have you ever heard a really cool song… and at just the craziest moment in the song… somebody rings a cowbell.  And it sounds perfect.  Right in the middle of the off-beat, you hear that “clang.”  I want to be the person who rings that bell.

Or.  The race car driver who gets to drive really fast, and take it hard into the turns.  You spin out… smoke squealing from your tires… and suddenly you right yourself.  You punch the clutch, take it back up a notch, and speed into the straightaway.   And the crowd goes crazy as the checkered flag swirls.

Maybe…. you are a ball boy for the Cleveland Indians, or the Pittsburgh Pirates.  On on a crowded Sunday afternoon game, a foul ball dribbles your way.  You pick it up… turn around… and chuck it into the stands to some little kid with one of those really big Number One Signs on her little hand.

I think a lot of people want to be doing something that they aren’t currently doing in life.  We want to do “some other thing” than whatever THIS is.

We may think it might be great to have a different job, or live in another location.  Or to have a list of amazing things we want to try, and cross them all off that list.  These things are all perfectly wonderful.

But perhaps… just maybe…. what we really want to do isn’t halfway across the world.  Nope.  I think it is probably right inside of each one of us.

Our true meaning in life.

We begin by developing purpose and intentions for our own lives..   For us to live complete, plentiful lives… in this crazy and complex world… is not always easy.  Finding what is truly in our hearts helps us figure our way through all of this.  What is in our very core.

I suspect it is vitally important to give our lives some sort of clear direction.  And we do this by exploring what means the most to us.
By developing a life purpose and life intentions.

The next part.  We have to choose to live our life intentions.  We do the next right thing.  We follow our purpose to the best of your ability every day.

It all sounds so very simple.  Yet.  For me, it is quite difficult. If I could only figure mine out.

I see people who are so great at this.  They… each day… change themselves from the inside out.  And it is constructive.  It sort of sends out inspiration and healing… to anyone around them.   Like ripples on water.  Or… like the clang of a bell… at just the right moment in a song.

It is beautiful.

Life is without meaning. You bring the meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be. Being alive is the meaning.  —  Joseph Campbell
    

For the meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day and from hour to hour. What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.  —  Viktor E. Frankl

I just thought of a funny little story which I don’t think I’ve ever told here.  It happened a few years back when we had a place in Charleston.  Here’s the deal.  I struck up a friendship with one of the cab driver’s down there.  He worked for Black Taxi Cabs… and our first interaction with that company was a bit of a fiasco.  But that is another story.

Anyway, my friend, the cab driver, I met at birthday party.  His name was Brian Prass (I hope he isn’t on FB… he’ll ring my neck).

So… to get back to it … one night… he had a late fare.  It was a nun.  She got into the cab and away they went.  Unfortunately…. Brian couldn’t quit staring at her.

Well. Apparently she couldn’t take it any more and she asked him why he kept staring.  To which Brian said….”I have a question to ask you but I don’t want to offend you.”

That old nun leaned forward and said “My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I’m sure that there’s nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.”

So crazy Brian tells her…..”Well, I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.”

I guess she looked a little startled at first and then told him that she would give him a kiss if he met two stipulations.  He had to be single  AND he had to be Catholic.

Brian got a little flippy and smiley…. and said, “Yes, I am single and I’m Catholic too!”

Unbelievable.  The nun said… “OK, pull into the next alley.”

So Brian pulls his cab into the alley behind the Days Inn.  And… of all things… that old nun fulfills his fantasy.   Brian was beside himself.  Goofball.

So… they pull back onto Meeting Street.  But… here is the thing about Brian.  He is a huge goofball.  He started crying. “My dear child.” said the nun, “Why are you crying?”

“Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I’m married and a I’m a Baptist.”

The nun says, “That’s OK, I am on the way to a Halloween party, and my name is Kevin.”

Okay… silly story.  But there is a good lesson to be learned here.  Things aren’t always as they appear.  We may think we know what something is.. by how it looks on the outside.  But the truth is, we might not be able to tell much at all by outward appearances.

Until we get to know something, we can’t possibly know what it will be like.   And whatever that something is…. it may mean something entirely different to someone else.   This all goes for people too.

I can only hope that I act with openness and compassion whenever I encounter someone new, or someone I don’t understand.  There is no need to be cruel in life.  There is only a need to be kind.

Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.  —  Dalai Lama

Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.  —  Lao Tzu

++~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~++
A good friend of ours is having surgery tomorrow… which will be today by the time most of you read this.  Time warp.

At any rate… she may need a little cheering up.  Apparently she lost a hip somewhere along the lines.. so those doctors are going to replace it… or some such business.  So tomorrow…I may tell a joke or something.

I couldn’t take it any more.  I just HAD to make the phone call.  You see, I had seen the commercial at least 100 times before.  And this morning during the Early Show News, I heard it again.

So I dropped everything and pulled out my phone.   I had the number in my contact list, and dialed away.   I was a little bit nervous… as I wasn’t even sure what I was asking about.  Does it help me to change?  Or get smart?  Or does it help me to grow?  I wasn’t sure.  But THIS question had be answered…. so I made that call.

I had dialed my doctor’s office.   The receptionist on the other end of the line finally answered.  “Can I help you?”

To which I responded… “Why.  Yes.  I’m calling to see if Latuda is right for me.”  After getting up all that nerve… to ask the question…  … well…. we got cut off.  I think.  I heard a click… and then a dial tone.

I don’t even know what Latuda is.  But I don’t think I want to be right for it.  I can’t stand the name of it.  Can you imagine at parties.. how awkward that would be in conversation.  “Polly, what’s new with you?”  “Oh… not much… but Latuda is right for me.  I asked.  It is.  And there you have it.”

It’s not like saying you went Zip-Lining… or Sky-Diving… or anything cool like that.  No.  It almost like saying… “Well… for fun … I cut my toenails on Friday night.”

Except… apparently… this Latuda Thing is risky business if it turns out to be right for you.  The commercial tells YOU to tell your doctor about any movements you cannot control in your face, tongue, or other body parts, as they may be signs of Tardive dyskinesia (TD).

And this TD thing is a big serious sledge hammer. It is a serious and sometimes permanent side effect. TD may not go away, even if you stop taking LATUDA.   There are about 50 other side effects too.

LATUDA can affect your judgment, thinking, and motor skills.

How could it be right for me?  I really don’t want uncontrollable movements in my face… or my tongue… or any other body part for that matter.  I have trouble enough controlling these things without Latuda.  Especially my bladder.

Oh.  But here is the thing.  This THING is no different than any other thing.  How do we truly no ANYTHING is right for us.  Sure, some times we get a feeling in our gut…. or in other cases…. we have a well-educated-guess.    But there is not such thing as a sure thing.  No safe bets.  No guarantees.

Life is full of uncertainties…. full of hits or misses.  And uncontrollable movements in our faces.

The best we can do… is our best.  It is great when we know what is right for us, and it works.  But in the cases where it doesn’t… that is okay too.  There is a lesson to be learned… which in turn… helps us to grow.  And when we are growing… we are facing the right direction…. toward the sun.

….  ….. …. Dag nab it.  Now it is happening again.   I can’t believe it’s not butter.   Here.  All this time! I thought it was butter.  … …. ….     ……….

Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.  — Brian Tracy

Dream A Little Dream.
Be Afraid.  Be Very, Very, Afraid.
The Chance of a Lifetime.
The Sky is Falling… The Sky is Falling.

These are some messages we get in this life.  In this society.   Among many others…. which can be totally contradictory.

Which brings me to this.  Are you a logical thinker, or a creative thinker…. or a little bit of both.   I think most people are both.  I am…. I think.  Therefore I am.  Yep.

Lately, I’ve been wondering about this.  Many people give up on their true goals and ambitions only to settle for things in life which they are not so thrilled about.  Mostly…. because it appears to be good insurance.  You know… a job, a relationship, a habit.

Most of the time… we seem to like things to be status quo. We sort of settle for circumstances that will at least keep us where we are… or slightly better than the next guy.  This is what society… and logical thinking…  tells us.   There are the things we are “supposed” to do to be fulfilled and happy.

Dude’s with funny names often come up with good quotes.  So.  As Deepak Chopra said, “The universe has no restrictions. You place restrictions on the universe with your expectations.”

If we could only believe this statement to be true.  If we took the ball and ran with it.  If we could just start expecting to live the life we have always wanted.   Would it become an actuality?

Now… this next one… I am learning from our chickens.  In all honesty, I was highly familiar with it before the New Hampshires came to eat and poop here.  Also… before they were acting like big chickens… or Chicken Little.

And here it is….. The single most debilitating emotion we as humans possess is fear.

There are so very many fears to list.  It could be fear of change, fear of failure, fear of what others think of us.  Or maybe we fear of success.  It seems that fear is undoubtedly the biggest thing that holds us back from going after our hopes, our goals, our dreams.

Fear often disguises itself as logical thinking.   “That could be risky… blah, blah, blah.”

If we are always expecting things to “not be that great”….  then how in the heck can we expect any differently?  Things can be great…. I think. We limit our existence.  Right there and then.

But.  If we try thinking creatively…. we open ourselves up to all sorts of possibilities.   New and different solutions, and ways of doing things.   We can start to recognize opportunities for growth and …. and utilize our specific gifts and talents.

I hope this next part is true.  Because a lot of big thinkers… have said it before.  The universe wants us to be happy and in love with our lives.  IT… the whole clockworks of IT…. needs you to be….. and me to be me.  And we to be we.  Each one of us has our very own gifts and talents… everything that makes us completely unique.  And when we see it… use it… and share it… we our giving our gift to humanity.  To one another.

There are a lot of phrases out there.  And proverbs.  Meanings to try to make sense of this life.

Chances are…. you’ve heard a truck load of them… in your day.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
All that glitters is not gold.

Don’t change horses midstream.
Don’t count your chickens before they are hatched.
Don’t cut your nose off to spite your face.
Good things come to those who wait.

In most every case… we either agree or disagree.
First up.
Birds of a feather flock together.  Yes or No?

I tend to agree with this one.  In general terms.  I think a lot of times, people with a certain set of religious, or spiritual convictions tend to flock one another.  Same with politics.  Yet, I have some friends with completely different views on these things than I.  Generally, in those cases though… they have much more to offer.  Like… boy oh boy… can they cook!  Or they have season tickets to the Steelers Games.  You know.

Okay…. what about this one.
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Again, in a broad sense … I think this one is good.  Yet.  There are times when something has been working the same way for 100 years.  But it may not be working at its best.  Small communities are classic for this.  The phrase… “But we’ve ALWAYS done it this way.”  This way of thinking tends to stunt progress.    However… in certain cases… like your washer and dryer.  Or your wall clock.  If it ain’t broke…  leave well enough alone.

In the kingdom of the blind the one eyed man is king
Necessity is the mother of invention
Rob Peter to pay Paul
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence

…. and on and on they go.  Most of them are clever and have a meaning that we can take away.  Whether we agree or not… is an entirely different matter.  For instance… “An eye for an eye.  A tooth for a tooth.”  If we follow this one… everyone is blind and can’t chew solids.

The one that hit me today was this.

“It is neither here nor there.”

I mean…. for crying out loud… sometimes these things make  absolutely no sense…. whatsoever.  If something is neither here… nor there…. then where in the holy-heck-a-moonie is it?

Oh… I am thinking it HAS to be somewhere.  I looked up the origin.  Apparently, in first appeared in the 1500s.   It was first recorded by a dude named Arthur Golding.    He wrote a translation of “The sermons of J. Calvin upon Deuteronomie”

That certainly clears things up…. like mud.

Which brings me to this…

Two wrongs don’t make a right
There’s safety in numbers
Variety is the spice of life
The opera ain’t over till the fat lady sings
When the going gets tough, the tough get going.

If phrases were horses…we’d get down to brass tacks…. and we’d take the cake.

and that my friends is neither here, nor there.

I guarantee it.

Today was the Fourth of July.  At least in our heads.

Every year we have a Fourth of July Party for our friends of softball.  I don’t really like to say it that way.  But that is how the big party started.  The Ohio Cardinals…. the softball players… not the State Bird….. would converge on our place for the big hooo-ha.

We’ve been doing this for a lot of years.  This year, for a number of reasons, we had to have it a little early.  And.  Of course, the attendees vary from year to year.  But no matter.

What a bunch of fun.  We didn’t do the normal fireworks display that we usually put on.   And that doesn’t really break my heart any… as fireworks scare the chicken feathers out of me.

Anyway.  We had fun.  Jollification.  Mirth, laughter, and glee.  With just a dash of merriment mixed in.   We swam.  We chatted.  We ate and ate and ate.   We drank beverages of varying intensity.  From water to fire water.  We played.  We sang.  There were introductions to the Chicken Family.   We spent really good time together.

Near the end of the evening, we played Gestures.  My team won.  Why is this important, you ask?  Because …. you can take the girl out of the game… but you can’t take the game out of the girl.  If I am playing, my competitive-hat goes on… whether I intend it to, or not.

One of our friends from afar… who could not fly in from California… suggested that we play Human Foosball…as seen on You Tube and Face Book.   We did not have time to construct such an apparatus… which may have turned out to be a blessing.   You see, not only am I competitive… but so is every other dame at this party.  I think there may have been injuries had we acted like the little spinning plastic men.

And… since we dodged a bullet with the Fireworks… no sense in putting ourselves in harm’s way on a life-size-foosball-table.

All of this aside… the main point is… Friends.  It is so very nice to be in each other’s company, sharing in conversation, recreation, and levity.  And of course.. good treats.   One thing about those really good friends… apart from all the fun… is that you know you can count on them.  We mutually choose one another.  We have good taste… after all.  Even if we are delusional about what day and month it is.

I am thankful for my friends.  And for all they are willing to share with me in life.  It is yet another thing, about this world of ours, that there is to love.  Love for living.  Love for life.

There are countless things of precious splendor in this life.  But there are three secrets to finding those simple joys.

1. Recognize them
2. Appreciate them
3. Spend some time with them

For me, I am pretty darn good at numbers 1 and 2.  But when it comes to number 3… I really suck.

But tonight was different.

I am typically on the move.  I stay busy with this and busy with that.  My brand new awesome Dick-Tracy-Apple-Watch tells me that I stand about 15 hours a day.  Most of that on-my-feet-time is moving this way and that.  And… tonight was much the same…at first.

I had a boatload of things I wanted to get done.  A big one on the list was to construct a new “chicken coop” in the garage for the young New Hampshires. For those of you out of the loop on the Chicken Scoop… we have 15 Orpingtons who are older by about 4 weeks. We also have 4 New Hamphshires.   All of them poop.  But…. Once the New Hampshires… Imogene, Eloise, Bernice, and Dorothy…. get a little older… we will put them all together.  Until then, the little foursome live in the garage.

So tonight, I worked and worked, ply and bending chicken fence.  Shaping… molding.  Building a little gate.  Then I cleaned things up, and a couple of hours later, the task was complete.

On to the next item on the list.

But wait.  The garage door was open.  The coop was all done, and a gentle breeze was easing its way into the garage.  Thunder rolled in the distance, as the storms had moved in.  A gentle rain was falling…. in the pitch black of night.

And those four little chickens.  They did not fear the sky.  They did not think it would fall.  Instead… they were running and playing and enjoying their new little wabbley, yet awesome, coop.

So I took my queue from them.  I grabbed an ice-cold soda, pulled up a stool, felt the mist of rain in the air…. and I simply sat and watched those chickens.

It was fulfilling.  It was beautiful.  It was one of those wonderfully simple joys in life.

I could see numbers 1 and 2 readily.  But this time…. I found number 3.  I can’t begin to tell you how good it felt.  And now I know.

Perhaps that is one thing that will make the world a slightly better place.  If everyone could make the effort…… in Finding Number Three.  Taking the time… any time…. to enjoy the simple joys of life.

We humans seem to keep rushing forward.  Getting this thing.  Trying that.  Achieving this goal at work.  Just Do It.   Go for the gold, get the promotion, win the contest.  Seize not only the day, but everything else.  And teach our children well…. we start our kids doing the very same thing…. in every program and every sport. Lest they be left behind.

Somewhere along the line, we got caught in this swirling skirmish that is perpetuated and reinforced by social and cultural means.  We get overtaken by  this impervious consumerism.  We lose track of our authentic selves.  Super-doooped-up lifestyles and  materialistic mindsets.  It all gets so complicated.  I am as guilty as the rest.

And.  As a result. We have forgotten some of mankind’s biggest life secrets along the way.  Too many to mention here.  But a few important ones, I suspect…

We have forgotten our place on earth.  In nature.  And in the universe. In the last few hundred years we have lost our communications in nature. We exploit it, and try to control it, and waste it.  The Native Americans had a handle on the listening to and understanding the natural cycles of the earth.  Its rhythms.  We have forgotten how to follow nature’s path and live in balance with it.  And eating Oat Bran Cereal in the morning, may not be quite enough.

And another.  There used to be ancient wisdoms.  We have forgotten these too.  Our ancestral soundness.  The stories.  The traditions, and legends. Scientific knowledge has abounded.  The head and logic over rule all.   And because of this, we have let go of  the true learning through the opening of our hearts.  The possibility of the magic.  We miss that very incredible harmony with the universe.  And eating Lucky Charms Cereal in the morning, may not be quite enough.

There are many more.  But maybe the biggest is this. Everything is Love…. and connected energy.

This is an all-encompassing truth. It is hidden somewhere deep inside of us.   All of us.  Somewhere along the line, the most of us forgot this notion of  inner-peace and love.  The everything of everything… is energy ….. and consciousness.  Most of all…. we once understood that love is the fundamental fabric of existence….  and it runs through all energy and consciousness.  We simply need to remember how.  I guess oatmeal might help.

Simply.
Then why does it all seem so very complicated?  So very often.

If I could throw a coin in the fountain and wish it all exactly as I want it to be… I am sure I would get splashed.

All we can do, on any given day, is try to open our hearts, our minds, and our selves…. to all which is in, around, and through us.  Simply.