Commercials.  They come and they go.

The Wide World of Advertising.  Branding.  Marketing.  We are all swept up in it… whether we want to be or not.  If you watch TV, listen to the radio, clickety-clack on the internet, get email, use Social Media, and on… you are in the midst of the Advertising Game.

I will never understand it.
They create great schematics.   They come up with plans and schemes, strategies and ideas.  Biff in R& D has a new proposal.  Kip in Trending Statistics has a new proposition.   And Ted…. in accounting has a completely different suggestion.  Whoa Nellie, Whoa..  There are action points and projects and  systems of method & stratagem.

It is all about the big money…. I will tell you.  And. There are a lot of big dollars in our hot little hands at stake. Not necessarily yours and mine … but the masses of consumers… here, there and everywhere.

What I don’t understand… really… is why things come and go?

I miss Mr. Whipple and his little toilet paper squeezing fetish.  I also yearn to see the Imperial Margarine guy… getting his crown.

Madge doesn’t soak in it anymore.  Dag nab it.

What the heck ever happened to the warm and fuzzy moments of the Cotton Commercials?

What about the long nostalgic walks down the long hallway in the Lifesaver Commercials?  Wasn’t everything… a “Lifesaver Moment”?

Today… the commercial are cool and sleek… vogue and hip.  They all sound like the music from Juno.  Or Sex in the City.

Don’t get me wrong.  I think today’s commercials are as snappy as they get.  Like Mini-Series.  But when the Quaker-Oat-Dude used to wink and smile… I felt a REAL connection.   Like I could really put my “Quaker” on…. and feel totally good about it.

I just get a little wistful and sentimental sometimes… you will have to excuse me.  Every time I buy tuna… which is pretty often… I shed a little tear for Charlie.  He had his 15 minutes of fame.  And now he is just some schmuck of a fish on the front of a tuna can.   Let’s not even mention the Chicken of the Sea Mermaid. I think she is in a home for unwed mothers… these days.

And the Frito Bandito?   Deported.    He was an illegal immigrant.  I mean… nothing else is made in the U.S.A.  So what is the big deal about Bandito?

I will never understand it all.  I think I will just go put on a cotton sweater and do some dishes in Palmolive.    When all else fails… I’ll hug a roll of toilet paper.

The importance of being earnest.

While this is the title of a movie, in which two friends use the same pseudonym (“Ernest”) for their sly and devious activities…..  it isn’t really what I am talking about tonight.  At least, I don’t think so.  I’ve never seen the movie.

Anyway… I am talking about the word.  Earnest.  I love this word.  I will probably name my first born son Ernest.

It refers to something which shows sincere and intense conviction.  It means to be devout and unfeigned.  To be impassioned.  To dive into things with a heartfelt attitude.   Authentic.  Honest.  Resolute.

I believe that in life… it is amazing when you have something that you truly feel earnest about.

Sometimes people do things out of duty, or responsibility, or need.  But sometimes those things are met with a certain lack of enthusiasm, or a bit of languor.

To be totally honest, I am on a few endeavors for community service.  I serve on boards, and work on projects, and those sorts of thing.  But it is an action of duty.  An obligation.   While I am dedicated, I cannot honestly say that I am passionate about it (at least not all the time).

On the other hand, I feed the birds.  Frequently and consistently.  I do it because I don’t want them to go hungry.  I do it earnestly.  It isn’t an easy task, and there isn’t any payoff or reward.  (Well… I get to watch them eat.  While that is completely cool… I could find other things to watch…. that would not be as involved, and cost so much.)

It isn’t my intention to gain praises or approval.  It is just something I do because I am whole-heartedly committed to it.

I wish I could understand more about myself… to know and find the things that impassion me.   Things that I would feel intense enthusiasm and conviction for.

I think there is a LOT to be said for the importance of being earnest.   I have met some people that seem to have an ulterior motive for most of what they do.  On the other hand, I have met numerous earnest individuals.  And when your motive is to do something…. because it is the good thing to do… an no one else is watching….

… well… you completely rock.  I wish good blessings for you.  Earnestly.

We all know the iconic picture.

I can’t remember how old I was… when  I saw this “scene” for the first time, but it was during a Saturday morning cartoon.

Yes.  The wise guru sitting at the very tippiest top of the mountain.

Porky Pig, or Bugs Bunny… or somebody animated…. climbed all the way to the top of the highest mountain peak… and struggled and scuffled to make the arduous ascent.  When he finally reached the top, he found the guru sitting there.  A little dude with his legs all crossed up in a pretzel knot.   He was wearing a simple white robe, and a long white beard.   And Porky, (or Bugs), gasping to get a breath, asked him the “HUGE” question he needed the answer to.  The guru gave him some ambiguous reply…. like… “A little mouse told me so.”, and it seemed as though the journey had been a big waste of time.

I had no idea then what this was in reference to.  In fact, it took me a long time to figure it out.  The Secret Meaning of Life.  The Secret Key to Finding Happiness.

And what I have finally come to is this.  There is no secret meaning of life, and certainly no secret key to finding happiness.  There is no secret at all.

I have always figured on…..  the magic bullet, the golden ticket, the secret recipe.  The guru at the top of the mountain with the great big answer to it all.  But there isn’t any.

The realization I have come to, is this.   I am on a personal journey.  I am on that climb up the mountain.  Sometimes I have to scramble and grapple to get to the next place… but what a beautiful place it is.  I just have to stop, sit my butt down on the ledge… and look out over the wide expanse… the green valley filled with trees and teaming with life.  The the birds circling in the air.  The clouds.  The sun.  And then when I am ready to start climbing again… I climb.

If I get to a point and meet a wise little fella at the apex of the climb… I hope we have a good visit.  But then I continue on my journey.  Maybe down a slope for a little while… and then back up again.

There are few things I have learned along the way.
• Keep an open mind and try not to be judgmental.
• Learn from my failures… as well as my triumphs.
• Stop and take the time to ask WHY.   A guy named Naguib Mahfouz said…. “You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions.”  That is as true as it gets.
• Learn to listen to others… and listen well.
• Listen to myself.   Be in touch with my instincts.  (** See earlier reference to “A little mouse told me so. **)
• Be okay with silence.   This may be the biggest one of all.

A recent study in Science Magazine revealed that “67 percent of men and 25 percent of women would rather give themselves electric shocks than sit still in silence and be present with their own thoughts.”

But wouldn’t you know it?  Our current  culture is one of constant communication and stimulation.  Silence makes most people feel unnatural and uncomfortable.

But that is when we really have the chance to cultivate personal wisdom. Whether you call it meditation or not… it is when I sit alone with my wandering thoughts  that I find new direction.  I learn from listening.

To myself.  To others.  The Guru… and the little mouse.

Unicorns sort of freak me out.

When I was growing up, a bunch of my friends had unicorn-everything.  Their rooms were decorated in unicorn-ish pleasantries… with unicorn posters and lots of rainbows and such.

Those unicorns scared me.  For one… they always had agreeable smiles on their faces… but underneath you gained a sense of baleful intent.  It wasn’t natural.  It reminded me of creepy clowns.  Acrimonious, at best.

Every once in a while I will have unicorn nightmares.  Creepy, crusty sinister clowns riding around on smug unicorns.

Then I am up for the night.  Heaven only knows I have enough trouble sleeping without all this tom-foolery going on in my head.

But.. when my cheek hits the pillow, I never quite know what to expect in the world of never-nod-land.

Last night, I dreamt it was my last day of high school.   The dream went on and on.  Saying goodbye to old friends, and such.  I was on a school bus at least five different times in the dream….  and it was packed full of beach towels.

At times, I was walking through the school with Gretchen Donovan, who I haven’t seen… probably since the night we graduated.   A lot of the areas were under construction.  We went through the cafeteria and they were serving Bisquick EVERYTHING.  Bisquick Pizzas, an Bisquick Sandwiches, and Bisquick Casseroles.  I said.. “I knew they had a stockpile of this stuff that they were just waiting to lay on us.”

Like I said, the dream went on and on and on.  I woke up shaking my head…. literally.  I said out loud “What the crap!?”  I am not sure if I said it in my dream… or when I woke up… but that is what I was thinking.

I don’t know where I will end up on any given night… in the distant corners of my brain.

But sometimes… I just wish I’d dream a little differently.  You know…  like when they mention on TV shows about the meanings of dreams.    Dreams where you are falling, or naked, or in water, or flying….etc.

I never have dreams like that.  Mine are always Tim Burton movies played in reverse, with a side of Abbott and Costello… or something.

But now… it is getting late.  And, well… time for another night of the unexpected.  The unknown.   Two weeks ago, I was trapped inside a box of Captain Crunch cereal.  There was no prizes or toys in the box… and I can remember thinking I would have been able to use it to MacGyver my way out.  No such luck.

So until tomorrow.  Sweet dreams. Like Captain Crunch and Unicorns.

Do you swear to tell the truth?  The whole truth?  And nothing but the truth?

Sometimes we try. But there are circumstances when glitches get in the way.  Glitches like Hearsay.

Yep.  Hearsay.  Now this is one of those things that have an incredible tendency to irritate me.  I do not like hearsay one bit.  I always try to dispel  it whenever possible.

As Webster explains…  hearsay is “information received from other people that one cannot adequately substantiate.  A Rumor.”

And there you have it.  Hearsay.  Rumor.  You know how that goes.  Something is said by someone.  And then……  people either don’t hear it right, or like to exaggerate, or they simply aren’t very good at regurgitating the details which were presented to them .  This thing becomes a circulating story of uncertain or doubtful truth.

Let us just put an example out there.  Suppose… last Tuesday… I said to the lady at the Deli… “I used to have an orange cat.  His name was Bud.”   By Thursday… the story runs along these lines:   “I heard Polly has a huge tiger that they keep in the barn out at their place.  They got it when it was a little orange colored cub and they paid a bunch of money for that that thing.  Now it weighs 900 pounds and it lives in one of the horse stalls. It ate their little dog, Buddy, on Tuesday.”

The little fleck of snow starts at the top of the hill, and by the time it rolls to the bottom, it is a boulder-sized snow ball.   An avalanche.

Sometimes… it has good basis.  Take the Hedge Apple.  Mostly, these things are just landscape nuisances.  Wildlife, such as birds, and deer, and such…..  won’t eat them because they taste nasty.

And then the hearsay.  People have made persistently big claims about putting Hedge apples indoors, to ward off insects.  But. ….  a few years ago, Iowa State University toxicologists extracted compounds from hedge apples. When highly concentrated, these compounds were, in fact, found to repel insects.  High concentrations.

But those scientists also found that NATURAL concentrations of these compounds in the fruit were too low to be an effective repellent. So, don’t be fooled into spending much money, time, or energy….  to use hedge apples as an insect repellent.

Truthfully, I am a pretty trusting person.  So when someone gives me information, which they say is credible, I believe them.    But I am learning that seeing is believing. Or is it?

These days… even that isn’t fail safe.  Photos can be shopped.  Audio recordings can be duped.   So what do you do?  Sometimes it can be difficult to know what is true, and what is not.  Especially when you think the source is reputable.    But I guess there is at least one way to slow this down.  Perhaps. Just because you “hear” it…. doesn’t mean you have to “say” it to anyone else.

All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them. —  Galileo Galilei

That sure is for the birds.
Geez.  What a bird brain.
Don’t you know, birds of a feather flock together?
Yep.  And two birds in the hand are worth one in the bush.
We can kill two birds with one stone.

Why, I ask you… are there so many bird idioms?
Counting your chickens before they are hatched…
As the crow flies.
Madder than a wet hen.
Naked as a jay bird.
Run around like a chicken with its head cut off.

On, it goes.  There are more bird phrases than clouds in Henny Penny’s falling sky.

Here is what I strongly suspect.
All bird phrases originated in the presence of politicians.

Read the list again.  You will see that they are all applicable.
Except for “Smart as an Owl.”  This one started, and most likely, ended with Lincoln.

Now please don’t get me wrong.  We love birds.  We love to watch them, and feed them.  All of them. Everyday.  Even the the Cooper’s Hawk that comes in and perches… and waits for some unsuspecting smaller bird… to let its guard down… and then SWOOOOSH.  The happy little chickadee quickly falls victim to this bird of prey.

Once again, the similarities to politics are uncanny.

It all could just be coincidence… I suppose.  But no matter.

In the end… I just say…

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.    And that means… equality for all.  No squawking about it.  And certainly no preying on the weak.

I’ll know one thing…. you sure can learn a lot from the bird phrases.

Sincerely,

Polly Does Not Want A Cracker.

Do you ever see, or hear something, and it elicits an immediate response, no matter where your little body is standing?

Dag nab it.  This happens to me frequently.  I see something, and it just strikes a chord.  Most of the time in a funny way.  And then… right out of my mouth comes a chuckle, or a comment, or a full-force belly laugh.

In the instances that aren’t so good,  my response usually comes in the form of the good old Catholic spout-out…  (which is a reference to a boy, his virgin mom, and carpenter dad).

Earlier this week, I was in the supermarket, and I’ll be danged if “Frosty the Snowman” didn’t come piping in on the airwaves.  I was in the middle of the ice cream aisle (appropriately) … and I said (rather loudly)…. “Ohhhh my Holy Goodness.  You have got to be kidding me!  Is this a dog-gone Christmas song playing?  It isn’t EVEN  Thanksgiving, for crying out loud!”

Several people turned and looked in my direction.  I played it down rather wisely… I started looking around… like I TOO was trying to find the person who blurted this out so abruptly.

Anyway.  My filter has some huge gaping holes, I’ll tell you.

In some ways I’ve gotten a little brazen about this.  For instance, if I am walking somewhere, and I am clearly in my own “lane” of traffic… (which typically in the United States is on the “right-side” of the road, sidewalk, aisle, entry, etc) …. and someone DOZES me over… or bumps into me.    High Karumba.

I typically have something ripe to say about it.   Like…… , Oh pardon me King Louis.

The older I get, the worse this gets.

Most of the times, though, I just see something and it makes me smile.  Like this sheep.  I will tell you… when this thing started looking at me… I thought it had the funniest face EVER.  But then its face started to squirrel up just a little more.   And… after a couple of minutes… it started… well…..  for lack of a better word….. Pooping.

Maybe this sheep is just like me.  It sees something that strikes a chord, and an immediate response is generated.   In this case…. sheep poop.

And once again I can count my blessings.  I am very thankful that all I do is chuckle, and occasionally say a few choice words.  If I start pooping in Aisle Nine of the grocery store… we are ALL in big trouble.

“Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.”  ― Albert Einstein

Here’s the deal.  I’ve decided I need a Magic Wand.

I was sitting in a class today, learning the learnable things.  And there were a heck of a lot of those learnables.  As I was soaking it all in, and thinking about all the practical applications, and the possibilities of utilizing this information… it became a little overwhelming.  There is SO MUCH that needs to be done.

To accomplish ALL the things I want to do with this new found knowledge … is going to take a bucketload of work… and at least… a gazillion hours.  I came to the realization that I would have a long road ahead with completing the bigger picture.    It takes a lot of time and energy to Save the World… don’t you know?

And then it hit me.
Square in the jaw, it hit me.  “I need a magic wand.”
Yes.   A big old ancient magic wand…. made of some crazy-good wood, and a little bit craggy in shape.  It could even have some crystals on it… and maybe one at the very top.   I can see it as plain as the Wizard cap on my head.

At any rate… a wand sure would come in handy.  I wonder when the heck they fell out of favor with the general public.  They have been around for a long, long time.  In fact, there are wands mentioned in ancient writings, they have been found in the tombs of Pharaohs in the Pyramids of Egypt.

References go all the way back to the 500 B.C.  and thereabouts.  In the ancient world, the go-to magi… were the priesthood of the Zoroastrian religion.   And they had wands.    Citations continue for hundreds of years thereafter.

But then it stops.  Did we quit using them during the Hoover Administration… or when?  I know witches brooms went out with the Hoover.

Anyway….   I sure could use a wand in my life.  Poof.  Laundry done. Dishes done.  Poof.  I’m now in the desert of New Mexico… soaking up some heat.  Poof.  Back again… in time to watch NCIS.

Big Poof.   Staving off another bonehead political move.  Poof.  Sent lots of food to the pantries, shelters, and food tents around the world.  Poof. Cured this illness and that.

Oh, I would come up with some big honking uses for my wand.  And at the end of the day… I’d do a little jiggy walk… and tuck it back in to the wand-holster on my belt.

I would have to go to bed early  and get ready for the next day… of making the world a better place…. with my Magic Wand.   We have established…… There is so very much that needs to be done.

Ahhhh.   But alas.  Tomorrow I face another day…. and ME…. without a wand.  On the other hand… I guess I can keep a notional magic wand in my make believe holster on my belt.  And then I can try make the world a better place, in my own little ways… touching the things that are within my reach.  And poof.

“Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.” – Roald Dahl

It turned really cold here in Ohio today.  Well… not really, really cold… but definitely below average for November.  I am not a big fan of the cold weather… but this is the time of year to hunker down, bite the bullet, and put up a tough front.  The older I get, the more and more I dislike the cold weather.  But not as much as Robert Scott.  I betcha’ by the time he died… that guy HATED the cold.

You see…. Robert Falcon Scott,  was a British Royal Navy officer.  He was also an explorer.  That turned out to be not so great for Capt. Bob.   His claim to fame was having led two expeditions to the Antarctic regions.  The first one was called  the Discovery Expedition, 1901–04.    The second was called the Terra Nova Expedition, 1910–13.

So as I mentioned…. the exploring thing didn’t turn out for Bob.  During the second venture, Scott led a party of five which reached the South Pole on January 17, 1912.  Unfortunately,  they traveled ALL that way ….. only to find that they had been preceded by a Norwegian expedition….. led by  Roald Amundsen.

But… … …and here is where things went south….. (no pun intended) Scott and his companions died from a combination of exhaustion, starvation and extreme cold…. shortly thereafter.

He became a British hero. His last note, written as he froze to death, read ‘For God’s sake look after our people’.  It was written March 29th, 1912.

And… they didn’t find Scott and his pals until November that year…. specificaly on todays’s date, 102 years ago.  Solid as a rock.

So… after hearing today’s story, I can count my blessings.   In comparison… today’s chilly temperatures were not that bad.    In fact… I came through it okay.  I’ve also gained knowledge.  I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up… but I can check Antarctic Explorer off my list.

“Treat those who are good with goodness, and also treat those who are not good with goodness. Thus goodness is attained. Be honest to those who are honest, and be also honest to those who are not honest. Thus honesty is attained.”  — Lao Tzu

My Dad died over a year ago.  I can’t tell you how much I miss him.  He truly was a great man, and I’m not just saying that because he was my Dad.  He undoubtedly, did a lot of good in this world… for a lot of people.  He was compassionate and kind in his entire being…. heart and soul.

One of the things he did during his life was serve the United States during WWII. He was stationed on the European Front.  A Gunny.    He never spoke too much about this thing of war.  I think it deeply affected him.  I know he felt much honor in duty to his country.  Our country.   But I am not sure he agreed with everything that war calls upon an individual to do.  To see. To experience.

For a little three-letter-word, “war” packs quite a punch.  It is about as complicated, consequential, and comprehensive as little words go.

You see….. people can’t seem to agree on things.   A very wide range of things.   And when this disagreement gets to elevated levels of hostility… over land boundaries… or genocide… or money ….  or egos….  this thing called war ensues.

I don’t like war one bit.  It only brings sadness, and loss.  It is cruel.  But I don’t know what the resolution could ever be.  Peace is the obvious answer.   But everyone has to be on board with peace.  Everyone.

And I don’t think that will ever happen in the existence of human beings.  In fact….  it is this inability which will most likely be the end to our civilization as we know it.  Hopefully not in our lifetimes, or our children’s children’s lifetimes.   There is that hope.

Today was Veterans Day.

As we all know, it is an official United States holiday that honors people who have served in the U.S. Armed Forces….. our Veterans who are called to duty in such wars.  My Dad.  Your son.  Our sisters, mothers, brothers, and all.

Always on November 11th.  To mark the anniversary of the end of World War I …..  at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918.   At least, that is when the Armistice with Germany went in to effect.

So tonight, I say thank you to all the Veterans who have served.  All those fine men and women who have been called to answer the unanswerable.

They have been brave.  They have sacrificed.  They have seen things that shouldn’t be seen.  Yet….. I do not think we will ever see World Peace.

But I hope and pray, like I am sure my Dad did….. that we simply will see more peace IN this world.  Each and every day.  And that each one of us, can be an active part in creating peace with one another.  Every day.  For the more peace we create… the less we will be a part of this thing called of war.

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.  –  Mother Teresa

It isn’t enough to talk about peace. One must believe in it. And it isn’t enough to believe in it. One must work at it.  –  Eleanor Roosevelt