Well, it’s not the first church I’ve ever been kicked out of….  HOWEVER…. in MY defense….

The sign on the wall is just a bit ambiguous.  Wouldn’t you agree?

“Don’t touch the Baptismal FONT.”  Okay, first, I do a lot of design work… print ads, websites, etc.  So when I see FONT, I think of “typeface”….. and clearly, that led me to believe that I couldn’t touch that sign on the wall, especially the word that said “baptismal”!  No problem-O.  It didn’t say anything about that sparkly bird hanging from the chain NEXT to the font printed on the sign.

So there I am, pulling up and down on that birdie on the chain…. as it turns out…..it lifts up that big marble lid…. up and down (BAM)…. up and down (BAM)… all of a sudden I was doing this great little rhythm.  I almost felt like I was in the Blue Man Group. There was water pitching everywhere outa’ that thing.  Every time I let that big marble lid fall… SPLASH!  I was drawing quite a crowd too….  had a real nice beat going….  water flying WAY up in the air.  Just like Vegas!

Next thing I know, I’m being led out by my elbow by this little fella in a cardboard collar. As he flicked me out on to the walk, he hollered… “I told you to quit yanking my chain!”  (Hell, like I could EVEN hear him over the clanking of the big contraption…..)