When I was a kid, there were all sorts of things I wanted to be. I didn’t want to be the actual people… I just wanted their abilities.

I wanted to play baseball like Davey Concepcion.

I wanted to be as smart as Albert Einstein.

I wanted to sing like Maria Von Trapp in the Sound of Music. She looked a lot like Mary Poppins, and I wanted to sing just like her too. The other…. was Fanny Brice in Funny Girl.

I wanted to play tennis like Billie King; swim like Mark Spitz; be funny like Lucille Ball…..

and I wanted to draw like Norman Rockwell.

Of course… none of these “Want To Be’s” came true.  We can’t all be kings.   But such is life. There are a very few talented people in the world of this class and style. However… these people took their talents, and mixed them with a good dose of work, determination, and discipline.

Tonight we went out with a couple of good friends to the Dayton Art Institute to see “American Chronicles: The Art of Norman Rockwell.”

I was enthralled with the exhibit… with seeing his work displayed in this manner. It brought back so many memories.

We had a big Coffee-Table-Book of Norman Rockwell paintings… on …. of all places…. our living room coffee table. I would sometimes step on it by accident when I was up on top of that table. Yes, those times when I’d be singing to the Funny Girl album…. dancing around… with my pretend microphone… in front to the big mirror above the mantle.

But the times I remember most with that book, is when I would pull it from its place on that make-believe stage…

I would grab a stack of looseleaf paper and a few good pencils with erasers. Then I would sit on the floor, with that book, for hours on end…. trying to draw like Norman Rockwell. No matter how hard I tried, how slowly and deliberately I made the lines on my paper… it never once looked like a Rockwell. Ever.

He was an amazing artist… producing more than 4,000 original works in his lifetime. Amazing paintings, and illustrations. He is best known for his covers on the Saturday Evening Post…. although his talent goes far and wide. What a delight for me to see this exhibit. What a privilege.

But there is a lesson in there for me.

We can’t wish to be like others. As much as I’d like to sing like Barbra Streisand, or hypothesize like Einstein…. or swim like a fish…. it is out of my realm. Those people are unique. We are all unique.

I think the best thing I can do….. is to be me. Just me and nobody else but me.

And…. to be grateful for the abilities I DO possess.   Thereafter, spending my days working on those talents with determination, spirit, and courage.

…. …. …But boy oh boy… that Leonardo da Vinci sure could paint…. I wonder if I could paint like that guy…..

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.  – Judy Garland

A well spent day, brings happy sleep.  – Leonardo Da Vinci

Predictions.

It seems that humans are largely preoccupied with them. In all shapes and forms.
By definition, to predict….. is to say or estimate that (a specified thing) will happen in the future. A forecast, prophecy, prognosis, projection, conjecture. A guess.   Some even think dreams are predictions.

Yessirree.  Humans to like to know what is going to happen next.  We really like to know what is going to happen way, way, WAY down the road.

Truthfully… neither is possible.  Not really.   There is no certainty in life… absolutely.   Strike that.  We can be certain of uncertainty.

“I think I am going to order the Cheeseburger with pickles and mayonnaise.”
Prediction.

“If you take a couple of Tylenol, it will help your headache.”
Prediction.

“The plane will arrive at 7:09 this evening.”
Prediction.

“The Groundhog SAW his shadow…… this means….”
Yep. Another Prediction.

We shape our whole day around predictions. Weather forecasts. Stock indicators. Point spreads on football games. Upcoming appointments. Cooking times on pot roasts. All these are merely conjecturing about what might happen, albeit some of these things are educated guesses. But all in all…. they are mostly suppositions.

We have lots of Psychics in the world.  People who say they can see the future.  Tell us what will happen.  Maybe.  Maybe not.  I think more of them would be winning the lottery…. or something.

Today is Nostradamus’ birthday. Michel de Nostredame… a French born doctor, and later a reputed seer. (14 December 1503 – 2 July 1566) A lot of people think old Nostradamus has predicted many major occurrences in our modern world. Maybe. Maybe not. But he is one of the most famous Predictors.

The Amazing Kreskin. Now there is a Predictor for you. Bends forks too.  He is a lot of fun at dinner parties… except for the “forks” thing.

Seems like a lot of other people like to guess about the future. Sometimes… they don’t quite hit the mark:

“Man will never reach the moon regardless of all future scientific advances.” — Dr. Lee DeForest, Inventor of TV

“I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.” — Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

“640K ought to be enough for anybody.” — Bill Gates, 1981

“Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.” — Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

“I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable who’s falling on his face and not Gary Cooper.” — Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in “Gone With The Wind.”

“There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.” — Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

And there you have it.  You just never know… about “around the corner.”    But, it makes us feel better to predict.  The thing about the future is… it comes to us one little minute at a time.  Maybe it would better not to predict it so much.  Maybe it would be better to enable that future…. … in hopes of making our dreams come true.

“Prediction is very difficult, especially when it is about the future.”
-Niels Bohr

Today, my Dad asked me to fix his Norelco Shaver. He is in his ninth decade…. and has been using an electric Norelco Shaver as long as I can remember. I was happy to make the repair… and thankfully, I could. But HE is the one who used to do all the fixing.

“Dad, can you fix my bike?…  Dad, I struck out in my last at bat, and we lost the game. Please make it better…..  Will you take a look at my car?….  Dad, I start a new job tomorrow and I’m nervous.”      But today, I was fixing something for him.

Things change.

My Mom used to be the best cook in the world. She loved photography. And knitting and sewing. These things don’t come so easy to her any more. Truth be told… they don’t come much at all.

Everything is in a state of change in this little thing called life.

We are all getting older by the nanosecond. With each tick of the tock…each and every one of us are aging.  Growing old.  It is inevitable.

For the most part… I am glad for this. Oh, it is true….. I am not as young and spry as I used to be. But with each of these passing years, I have discovered things about myself…. in ways that I never could have imagined in younger times.

Change. Sometimes it is very hard. Other times, transformations are a welcome phenomenon.

When we are young…we have this misguided notion of infallibility… of certainty. We think we are unbreakable.

But the fact of the matter is… we are all very vulnerable. We are susceptible to all sorts of life’s mysteries. Sometimes this is fortunate, and other times it is not.

I don’t know if I really have much to say about all this… other than it just seems to me… this is how it works.  We are trying to keep our balance on this huge ball… which is looping a very big sun… indefinitely.

Tonight I am glad to be sitting here, writing… at this very moment. It is obviously, exactly where I am supposed to be.

And tomorrow….. I may be the one who does the fixing… or I may be the one who needs the fixing.

I think… THAT is just how it goes.

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. – Aldous Huxley

The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything. – Oscar Wilde

Today I think I should give a bouquet
To birthdays of all sorts…people born on each day.

A holler, a cheer, a big whoop-dee-doo
For folks just like me… and some just like you.

So pull out the cake, the ribbons and presents.
Cook big fluffy game hens, or even small pheasants.

To celebrate friends… show we’re glad for their birth.
They mean to us more, than all else on this earth.

If this little verse starts to sound somewhat Seuss-ical.
It is more like the book, and less like the musical.

So I’ll sing, and I’ll clap, and I’ll kick my left heel.
I’ll cause a commotion…. I’ll make a big deal.

Play the tuba, the fiddle, or bang on the drum.
Sing it sideways or backwards… or give it a hum.

I mean just to tell them what they mean just to me.
I’ll say it with heart. I’ll shout it with glee.

From the rooftop or doorway or even the bus.
Be quite sure of this… I will make such a fuss.

To say Happy Birthday to all… and to YOU.
I’m glad you were born on the day you were due.

Thanks for giving and sharing and being so nice.
And the time that you lent me your red fuzzy dice.

You make the world sparkly. You do thing so right.
So happy day to you… from morning ’til night.

Great people born on December 12:

John Jay, First chief justice of the United States…old
Gustave Flaubert, French novelist…. old
Edvard Munch, Norweigan painter, old
Arthur Garfield Hays, American lawyer and defender of civil liberties… old
Edward G. Robinson, American actor and singer… old
Hubert Seuss Geisel, Dr. Seuss’ brother… old
Frank Sinatra, American singer, actor…old
Bob Barker, Gameshow host…. old
Ed Kock, Former Mayor of New York…. old
Connie Francis, American actress, singer….old
Dionne Warwick, American singer … old
Mary A. Bullen, American awesome person…. young

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” – Dr. Seuss

“Human speech is like a cracked kettle on which we tap crude rhythms for bears to dance to, while we long to make music that will melt the stars.” – Gustave Flaubert

“Practice compassion.” – Mary A Bullen

I think I’ve said it before…. but it always bears repeating:

There are three kinds of people in the world.
Those who are good at math….
and those who aren’t.

Which leads me to this.  During the past week, I’ve heard that old cut-and-dry phrase a few different times…

“There are two kinds of people in the world, those who….”
and then the last part of it always changes. It morphs into something different depending on each situation.

There are two kinds of people in the world… homebodies and adventurers.

There are two kinds of people in the world… givers and takers.

….those who like cherry pie, and those who like apple.

…. those who tell the truth and those who lie.

…. cat lovers and dog lovers.

…. liberals and conservatives.

…. pessimists and optimists.

Oh…It can go on and on for days. But once again, I think there is always that third option. Those who are a little bit of both.

Most of the time… it seems….  I find myself in the “both” category. Take the first one. Homebodies vs. Adventurers. Oh, I will be there first to admit I am a homebody of homebodies. Capital H.  Whoever coined the phrase “There is NO place like home,” is directly related to me, I am sure.  I would rather be home than anywhere. On the flip side of that… I enjoy seeking original ideas and finding unknown things. I love to go out and explore new places, see new sights, smell the roses. But when I am through… I like to go back to the comfort of my home with all my home-family.

Liberal vs. Conservative…. I lean more toward the liberal end of the scale. But there are a lot of conservative ideas that I think are good… and which I value.

I like cats and dogs. Sometimes I am optimistic… other times I am downtrodden.  These are just a few examples.

I’m not sure what it is about me… that I am seldom “all or nothing.” Frequently I can be found tottering up on that fence.

Call me indecisive. Or don’t. Oh, I don’t know… again… I’m having a hard time making up my mind about this… okay… maybe I am a bit vacillating…. dang, I wish I could make up my mind about this…..

One thing I do know… there is no such thing as a sure thing. And just when I think I am absolutely sure and positive about something… someone introduces yet another possibility to me.

And truly… I love that part about my life. There always seem to be endless possibilities in this universe of ours. Heck… there may be a chance, that one day,  I’ll be good at math.

The old adage of “two kinds of people in the world” is as old as the hills… with more fill-in-the blanks than I could ever write about here. And many people have offered observations in its recognition.

Abigail Van Buren noted…. “There are two kinds of people in the world – those who walk into a room and say, ‘There you are!’ – and those who say, ‘Here I am!’ ”

Yes a good quote indeed. But to that, I say… in response…. “Here WE are.”

And how glad I am for WE and the endless possibilities it brings….

__________________________

“The only thing that makes life possible is a permanent, intolerable uncertainty: not knowing what comes next” -Ursula K. Leguin

“We have more possibilities available in each moment than we realize.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

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Well, that isn’t working…… at all. I guess I have to take these things off.

But how in the world is a girl supposed to take off her very first pair of Sock Monkey Mittens?   I have been wearing these things all night.   I am in a state of absolute jubilation… exuberance…. delight.

Imagine my surprise when I opened the gift box and there they were.   All red-mouthed and wooly-cute-as-can-be. I did a happy dance right around the kitchen. Twice. This could be one of my all time favorite presents ever. Ever. My spirits soared. I lit up from the inside out… with an unexplainable childlike joy.  Really.

I’ll tell you though… for all the glory of Monkey Gloves…. they are the dang-dest things to try to type in. It seems I was making no sense at all.  (Well, I guess that is really no different from most nights.)

But back to the mitts.

We had friends over for dinner this evening. (Yummy Arroz con Polo. Mmmmm. )

Wouldn’t you know it?  Here it is around Christmas time, and these two very dear friends came bearing gifts. And one of those offerings were these beautiful mittens. I kinda’ think these people know me.

Yes… good friends indeed. The people who know you…. really, in truly, know you.  And still manage to love you…. even if you are a little loopy….. or all-out-goofy.

I am thankful for them, and… of course for my brand new spectacular Sock Monkey Mittens. Yarn never looked so good. And now… I understand what it means to have friends that are close-knit.

“A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked” – Bernard Meltzer

It is that time again.  Yes.  You-Know-What is just a couple of weeks away.  Some years, I love the whole Christmas Season… other years, I can be a bit of a Scrooge.

I think I am less Scrooge-ish in my life than I ever have been. On the other hand…. I don’t go swoopy-in-the-head over decorations, and lights, and that whole deal.

But one thing is for sure…. every year. Christmas time conjures up all sorts of memories.

My thoughts become filled with sugar plums dancing…. cookies baking…. Jack Frost nipping at my nose… all things swirling around “The Magic of Christmas”…..

You know…. When I first learned about Christmas… as a kid… it truly was all very magical. I was first introduced to the story in the Bible about the miraculous birth of Christ. But the story in itself is very intriguing and mysterious. A family traveling in the dark of night, following a star to their destination, kings coming and bearing gifts, the birth of a child in the midst of palm trees, and manger animals. Angels singing. Peace on Earth.

For a little girl in downtown Dayton, Ohio… this was a reverie of images and ideas.

As if that wasn’t enough. Next I learn about the other part of Christmas…. which becomes the “fantastical” part for children in our culture. This guy… jolly and bright… who lives at the North Pole….  And not in just any old house.  His home is trimmed with candy canes, gum drops and icing.  This red-suited man twitches his nose and scooches up and down chimneys  … employs loads of little elves… has flying reindeer… a toy workshop…

At any rate… this guy… it is like he JUST KNOWS if you are naughty or nice. If you behave, you get TOYS! Make a list. Check it twice. Mail it northward, and on Christmas morning… right before a huge breakfast… you get to wake up early and rip into beautiful packages with YOUR name on them.

Fisher-Price Little People.  Rock’Em Sock ‘Em Robots. A 10-in-1 Magic Kit. Leggos. Playdough. Holy Pajamas…. My palms are getting sweaty as I type this.

Yes, revisiting these memories in a wonderful thing.

But amidst all the anticipation, frolic and festivity… there was an incredible sense of happiness, joy, and love in the air.

And it is that feeling…. that hits me… when I see “Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer” on TV… or see a beautifully decorated tree. It warms me through and through.

That magic all comes back. From the very top of the story I learned as a child… all the way down to the bells on the tip of the elves’ little green boots. It is like a big warm hug… which reminds me that there are still a lot of good people in the world. Good people, with noble thoughts and intentions and deeds. Fine people helping one another and showing exceptional acts of kindness. Following that shining star. Doing the next right thing.

That… to me… is the magic of Christmas.

No wonder people start decorating WAY before Halloween.

“You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” -K.Gibran

Wouldn’t you know… doing this Project 368 has a perk from time to time.  On occasion, I am granted an interview with certain “personalities” in the media.  I thought a phone call to Mr. Dan Quayle was in order… since his endorsement of Romney has been heavy in the news.  And guess what?  He agreed to speak with me.  So….  I reprint the phone interview which was conducted in the very early hours yesterday.

______________________________

Polly Kronenberger: Mr. Quayle. Thanks for doing this interview. I truly appreciate your time. I understand you are visiting the Windy City right now. How are things up that way?

Dan Quayle: “It’s wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.”

PK: Uhhh. Okay then. Well, Mr. Quayle, for our younger audience, let me remind everyone that you served as the 44th Vice President of the United States, serving with President George H. W. Bush (1989–1993). If you had to describe your vice presidency with one word… what would it be?

DQ: “One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice-president, and that one word is “to be prepared”

PK: I see. Well, one of the reasons I requested this interview is that you’ve recently given your endorsement of Mitt Romney as the Republican Presidential candidate for 2012. Is this correct?

DQ: Well Polly… “This election is about who’s going to be the next President of the United States!”  “This isn’t a man who is leaving with his head between his legs”

PK: That is an interesting perspective sir.

DQ: Please, call me Dan. Or Danny Boy. I like that too.  Or Dan-O.

PK: Do you think Mitt Romney has what it takes to win? To beat Obama?

DQ: “Votes are like trees, if you are trying to build a forest. If you have more trees than you have forests, then at that point the pollsters will probably say you will win.” 

PK: Ohhhhhkaaaayyyy. Yes… well, let’s talk about some of the issues that are on the table… and what may have influenced you in making this endorsement.  How do you think the current taxing proposals of the Republican Party will affect the poor vs. the rich in America?

DQ: “Republicans have been accused of abandoning the poor. It’s the other way around. They never vote for us.” “It shows `us vs. them,’ and I’m on the `us’ side.

PK: Let’s switch to foreign policy. There has been a lot happening in Iraq, Afghanistan, and now, of course, Iran. What are your thoughts about the tension in that area?

DQ: “The global importance of the Middle East is that it keeps the Far East and the Near East from encroaching on each other”

PK: Oh my. That certainly clears things up.   Switching gears sir….What are your thoughts about education? Do you think our current system is failing in this country?

DQ: “We’re going to have the best-educated American people in the world.” Here is the problem… “No more fuzzy math where four plus three feels like seven. It is seven. No more creative spelling either, I’ve tried that and it doesn’t work” “But quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.”

PK: Right. Okay. Ummmm….

Well, Mr. Quayle…. Dan… That is about all the time we have tonight. Any closing remarks you’d like to make before we hang up the phone?

DQ: “The future will be better tomorrow.” “My friends…. no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will, never, never surrender to what is right.”  “We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not happen”    And just remember… “People who bowl vote. Bowlers are not the cultural elite.”

PK: Thank you sir and goodnight.

___________________________

As an avid bowler…  I say….   Quayle’s right about one thing….    I DO….  indeed… vote.

(**NOTE:  All Dan Quayle quotes are actual quotes given by the former Vice President, throughout is political career.**)

___________________________

Today was a travel day for me… specifically… flying.  Not the flapping-of-my-arms kind.  No.  It was the getting-on-a-big-plane kind of flying.

I tend to get a little irritable as a result. A bit scrappy around the edges.

( — Hang on a second… while I go get my favorite Soap Box out of the closet. Okay.. I’m climbing up on it now…. and… back to the point: —- )

Sure… flying can be a bit of a hassle.

But what gets me the most are some of the people I encounter while on the trek home. The ones that have a healthy heap of entitlement mixed in with their otherwise surly attitudes.

Traveling about the United States…. as we darn well please….  is an amazing freedom. We have lots of freedoms here in America that we mostly take for granted. These have been afforded to us by the resolution of many complicated, and strenuous situations. Mostly…. by service men and women, who have given their lives in our defense and protection.

Now….. I don’t claim to know how it all works.

But today is the anniversary of Pearl Harbor. Two thousand, four hundred Americans were killed in that attack in 1941. This is just one for instance.

So….  .. ….  Back to flying. We are asked to give up certain luxuries… in order to fly. Security Measures. TSA Restrictions.

People get their underwear all bunched up….. over the constraints placed on us during commercial air flight. I have a very simple solution to it.

Don’t fly.

Alec Baldwin got kicked off a plane for not turning off his iPad when the flight attendant asked him for the 6th time to power it down.  Guess what? It is called a rule Alec. The rest of us have to turn off our electronic devices when asked. Either… don’t fly. Or…. turn off the iPad.  (He got off the plane.)

An 85-year-old woman was subjected to a pat down recently. She was absolutely livid about having to undergo such an ordeal. How could the TSA think an 85-year-old-woman is a terrorist?  Bunk, she said. Well…….That’s how it works for everyone lady. From babies to 110. No one is exempt. Either do what they ask… or don’t fly.

It is that simple.

Leave your bottled waters beyond security. Take your shoes and your belt off. Pull your laptop out of your bag… and put it in the tray. Make this huge and incredible sacrifice… huge…. huge….

It isn’t the TSA’s fault that these measures are in place. It isn’t the government’s fault. Not the airlines’ fault. Nope.

And as you are making this noble and tremendous gesture…. complying with these rules of commercial flight….

Try to remember the sacrifices that are given daily… by service men and women of the United States… in protection of our rights and freedoms.  Now that is huge.

This day started as many do. I woke up and flipped on the news. Most mornings… it takes me down a notch, and I’m not sure quite why I keeping tuning in. But I do.

However, as I met with my first cup of coffee, I was given the announcement of this very good news. Yes. It is true. It does exist. Planet Kepler 22b. I always knew it was out there… just a matter of time until they zeroed in on it.  Boy oh boy…. did I ever get a case of Happy Feet…. right there in the kitchen.  I jumped for joy.

I have big theories about this Planet Kepler 22b.  I can’t divulge too much here.  I am planning to reveal all this information in new my book… due to hit bookstores in a light year or two.

Now I know there are plenty of naysayers out there. If you are one, please… go back to reading your Wheaties Box for a few moments. THIS… is a tribute to our sister planet Kepler 22b. Surface temperature…. a balmy 72 degrees Fahrenheit.  Same planetary density as earth..  a good supply of water… nice sun… and all of this in what they call the Goldilocks Zone.

Grab your porridge.  Pack your bags…. and leave a note. Oh sure… I know we will probably never get there in our lifetimes. It is 600 light years away. But just in case… I went out and made some preparations today.

Okay.  I scoped out some good places for a possible launch. Or maybe even a pick up from some nice Kepleranian Space Ship.  Perhaps……a really high church steeple seems like it might be good… or a tall government building. Or both structures… on the same very same block….. such as these.

For the long ride…. Sleeping Berries. Kind of what like Snow White ate… but no wicked queen.  And they sort of taste like apples.  Good for at least a 400 Light Year Nap.

Of course .. … I want to be well received on the new planet.   So….. new shoes are in order. The Alien Variety.  I think the Kepler folks will like me in these.

After much traipsing around, and preparing for the big day… I finally decided to head back to my Earth Home on Meeting Street.

Holy Crap-A-Moley.  I could NOT believe my eyes. It looks to me like I missed the dang boat! Well… space boat.  I came across this construction site… just up the alley from us.  The whole crew… gone….. VANISHED.   Not a soul around.  All they left behind were their picks and shovels.  Oh…. and a few Sleeping Berries.

That is just how it goes. It seems I am always a day late… and a dollar short.

Yep… looks like I missed the bus to Planet Kepler.  But it is probably just as well.  I think I have lots to do here.

(But now I don’t know what to do with these shoes….)

“How we spend our days, is of course, how we spend our lives.” -Annie Dillard

“To infinity, and beyond.” – Buzz Lightyear