{"id":3425,"date":"2015-04-07T23:07:18","date_gmt":"2015-04-08T03:07:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/?p=3425"},"modified":"2015-04-07T23:56:09","modified_gmt":"2015-04-08T03:56:09","slug":"sorry-about-your-shoes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/?p=3425","title":{"rendered":"Sorry about your shoes."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"walkingshoes\"<\/a><\/p>\n

We can\u2019t possibly know what another person is feeling\u2026 exactly.\u00a0 We just can\u2019t.\u00a0 We may try\u2026\u00a0 and try very well\u2026 especially if we have had a similar experience, or come from a similar existence.<\/p>\n

It is called\u2026..Empathy.\u00a0 Empathy. And to describe it?\u00a0 Well\u2026 here it is.\u00a0 As the old dictionary puts words to it\u2026. Empathy means to be capable of identifying and understanding another person\u2019s feelings, without experiencing them for yourself at that particular moment.\u00a0 You know how the old saying goes\u2026 Walking a mile in someone else\u2019s shoes.<\/p>\n

As I eluded to above\u2026. here is the deal.\u00a0 Surprisingly, the ability to empathize with others \u2026. is very reliant on our OWN capacity to identify and understand OUR OWN feelings.\u00a0 And, if we can do this\u2026.. we are able to project OUR feelings onto others. (And we\u2019re walking\u2026.)<\/p>\n

But wouldn\u2019t you know.\u00a0 Unless you have been through the things that person has BEEN through, it becomes complicated, even difficult\u2026. to understand what the other person is\u00a0 undergoing.\u00a0 If we haven\u2019t had similar feelings or experiences\u2026 we just don\u2019t normally get it.<\/p>\n

A lot of other things come into play\u2026\u00a0 but it is hard.\u00a0 Like, I don\u2019t know what it is like to be homeless.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know what it is like to be a dark-skinned person.\u00a0 Or to be handicapped.<\/p>\n

But I think it is important to try.\u00a0 It helps with Life Compassion.\u00a0 We should, quite possibly, make it an intention to respond with \u201cunderstanding\u201d instead of anger.<\/p>\n

Truth be told\u2026 here it is.\u00a0 People are just trying to be happy, for the most part.\u00a0 When we see and feel life from somebody else’s point of view, I think we can realize that other people are simply trying find happiness in their own lives\u2026 and in their own ways.<\/p>\n

AND\u2026. Most folks aren\u2019t on some life mission to \u201cget\u201d us\u2026 or cause us to be miserable.\u00a0\u00a0 That guy in the polyester baseball cap, probably didn\u2019t mean to pull out in front of you and then drive very slowly in a 50 mph zone.\u00a0 Truly.<\/p>\n

There is a Buddhist practice called “exchanging oneself for others” that is intended to cultivate compassion and empathy.\u00a0 It is called “tonglen.”<\/p>\n

What happens is\u2026 as we breathe in\u2026. we bring into ourselves that which is difficult, problematic and upsetting from the other person.\u00a0 We think about all the things we wish we could get rid of.<\/p>\n

And then\u2026. as we breathe out, we send them every good quality — openness, clarity, affection, peace — everything we would like to hold onto.<\/p>\n

If done with true-ness, it can be very liberating.<\/p>\n

So believe me when I tell you, I am breathing in, and breathing out.\u00a0 I work very hard at this\u2026 until some numb-know does something that confounds me.<\/p>\n

Then the Zen goes out the\u00a0 window, and I have to put those shoes back on\u2026 and walk.\u00a0 It is all\u2026 just a journey after all.\u00a0 One little step at a time.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe must learn to regard people less in the light of what they do or omit to do, and more in the light of what they suffer.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 —\u00a0 \u2015 Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We can\u2019t possibly know what another person is feeling\u2026 exactly.\u00a0 We just can\u2019t.\u00a0 We may try\u2026\u00a0 and try very well\u2026 especially if we have had a similar experience, or come from a similar existence. It is called\u2026..Empathy.\u00a0 Empathy. And to describe it?\u00a0 Well\u2026 here it is.\u00a0 As the old dictionary puts words to it\u2026. Empathy […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3425","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nowyouseeit"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3425","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3425"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3425\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3432,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3425\/revisions\/3432"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3425"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3425"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3425"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}