{"id":1327,"date":"2014-07-08T00:09:16","date_gmt":"2014-07-08T04:09:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/?p=1327"},"modified":"2014-07-08T00:09:16","modified_gmt":"2014-07-08T04:09:16","slug":"this-sorta-bugs-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/?p=1327","title":{"rendered":"This sorta’ bugs me."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"flyguy\"<\/a><\/p>\n

As I readied myself for the day, the black blur shot across the mirror in front of me.\u00a0 Then\u2026 the very hairy large fly began to make several swift, and dangerous passes at my head.\u00a0 They were Kamikaze-like.\u00a0 Yet.\u00a0 He had no intention of bombarding me.\u00a0 He was merely taunting me.<\/p>\n

I proceeded to apply the last little bit of my favorite hair-jelly to my scalp.\u00a0 Again, and again the insect grazed my hands and ears.\u00a0 Enough was enough.\u00a0 I reached for the fly swatter and laid it conspicuously on the counter in front of me.\u00a0 It had to happen.\u00a0 You see…. IT was me.. or the fly.<\/p>\n

With comb in hand\u2026 I looked down.\u00a0 And there he sat.\u00a0 Right in the middle of that swatter\u2026. knowing well enough that I could not operate that swatter without alerting him. Yes\u2026 he sat there\u2026 smugly.\u00a0\u00a0 All 12,000 eye-facets staring up.\u00a0 NOW…. he was mocking me.<\/p>\n

And so it goes.<\/p>\n

You thought the Apple Corporation came up with some great ideas.\u00a0 The iPhone, the iPad, the iCloud.<\/p>\n

Well they have nothing on me.\u00a0 In the summer time\u2026 I have with me\u2026 all the time\u2026. the iItch.\u00a0 Unlike any other… THIS app allows me to be an itchy-mess from morning to night.<\/p>\n

Oy yes\u2026 it is true.\u00a0 If there is a bug with a biter on it\u2019s little head\u2026 it will find a way to bite me.\u00a0 Spiders, ants, mosquitos, UFOs (Unidentified Flies and Others).\u00a0 They sniff me out and hunt me down.<\/p>\n

My blood must be\u00a0 something along the lines of Folklore-ish proportions among the insect world.\u00a0 It must be some right of passage for them.\u00a0 They come from miles around just to feast on me.\u00a0 My body resembles a connect-the-dots game.\u00a0 But redder.<\/p>\n

Sometimes it even happens by mistake.\u00a0 The other day I jumped in the pool after doing a lot of work outdoors.\u00a0 After the swim, I threw a shirt on, and came back in the house.\u00a0 Suddenly, my shoulder started hurting in a strange and significant fashion.\u00a0 I flipped my shirt back off, and there was a very confused bee\u2026 in search of pollen on that bright yellow shirt\u2026 only to find my shoulder.\u00a0 Put a stinger in it… goodness.<\/p>\n

Yes\u2026 that is the deal for me in the spring and summer\u2026 and into the fall.\u00a0 But I do not complain.\u00a0 I would rather it be hot, muggy, and buggy, than to be back in the midst of the frozen Ohio Tundra of last year.\u00a0 So bring it on bugs.\u00a0 Bite Me!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhen people bother you in any way, it is because their souls are trying to get your divine attention and your blessing\u201d\u00a0 –\u00a0Catherine Ponder<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As I readied myself for the day, the black blur shot across the mirror in front of me.\u00a0 Then\u2026 the very hairy large fly began to make several swift, and dangerous passes at my head.\u00a0 They were Kamikaze-like.\u00a0 Yet.\u00a0 He had no intention of bombarding me.\u00a0 He was merely taunting me. I proceeded to apply […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1327","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nowyouseeit"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1327","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1327"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1327\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1332,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1327\/revisions\/1332"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1327"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1327"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gollypolly.com\/30473\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1327"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}